[PancakeBrah]

Vulgar -

This read a little different than from what I'm used to from you, probably due to the more linear story formatting. Not better or worse just a bit stylistically divergent. Less allusions and whatnot. As for the verse's content, this was up to your usual standard. You took an interesting route with the topic and executed. The descriptions were the strong point, as is the usual for your verses, but you kept a strong through-line of plot as well which connected all those descriptions. Solid opening effort to the season. I particularly enjoyed

"The pressures of DNA alteration were painful; they even mechanized his urinal tract
if he had acquired anything, it was the immortality that Copernicus lacked
Many futurists and technological purists were alarmed at all the bad reports
concerning how test subjects ended up as museum exhibits and as lab décor"

King Ra -

I didn't click the link. It's my opinion that verses should stand-alone in this league, and while an epic topical piece spanning multiple Open Mics is an interesting idea I think it's a bit unfair to both you and your opponent in a league-setting. It can either give your piece undue weight and length or it can be an advantage to your opponent by only being a fragment or portion of something with no clear beginning and end. I think both cases apply here. I enjoyed your level of writing in this piece and felt it was one of your stronger efforts, one that raised my esteem of you in a larger sense. But this is a piece of something I'm not familiar with and don't plan to just to help you maybe get a vote. I think that if you had written something different, encapsulated in one verse, at the level you did here you may have had a chance to go toe to toe with an excellent Vulgar verse. As for the actual content of the verse, it was interesting. I think the tie-in to the topic was a little tenuous and maybe shoehorned in. But you set a scene, a confrontation, a final showdown of sorts. And, again, you wrote with a deft touch. But the overall problems with your saga route were too much for me.

Interesting match.

V/ Vulgar