im gonna get a lil in depth but its just for the sake of clarity, not tryna be hard on anyone
I'm ready for war and makin em live and die to the sword,
Only time he 'royalty' is in his 'queen Bee fantasy' while listenin to Lorde,
I like the concept, but the execution seems scattered. the setup, for example isnt really related to the punch, you're just rhyming for rhyming's sake there ya know? could be more direct but overall good idea
Fuckin faggot seen more cock than any bathroom stall,
They call him 'Seattle's D' the way he intercept and beat so many balls,
At this point this kind of concept is a little played out. execution was pretty good, but you need to get a little more creative cause most dudes seen this sort of thing before. like i did two super bowl related lines last week and had to think it through a little bit to find something to flip
I kill clowns in the jungle this joke stuck in the grapevine,
Niggas laughin at Jon like he the 'Don Demarco' of every punchline,
alright but a little basic and again kind of scattered, the setups kind of awkward here and doesnt really rhyme but you did pretty well in the punch with this idea
I'm gang signin like sign language watch my hollows bomb,
This pussy gettin blasted worse than 'Jon and Kate plus 8' or the 'octomom',
pretty much anything flipping pussy is gonna be played. but you coulda done more with this to make it a little harder like saying 'this pussy gettin torn to shreds'... look for little things to make it hit harder but the main thing here is don't use pussy flips unless its really fresh or personal
I wreck bitches, so this 'Miley wannabe' gettin derailed,
Cuz he tryna make a comeback from 'country' but fuckin failed!
this is actually a pretty good idea but it doesnt come out too clear. like the setup could've had something to do with losing to GoW last week and capitalize country, then even if i didnt know GoW = country I could figure it out
so overall like the concepts in the first and last bar, you had two fairly played ideas and one that was kind of awkward. could just be more direct with wording
School days they had different names 4 ppl that had that shit, know u sick
Cuz back then u stayed away from the niggas with that sauce, n floss already admits 2 it
im not really a fan of sig flips
U trash, bottom feeder so shit pilling on em is the usual, ya far from boss
Niggas all fillter, stay between dirty then tossed... the soul purpose of floss
sole*, but nice nameflip
W/ that name ya lost, all shit, wont be attending an event hosted by this hoer
But he known 2 get crowds movin, heads turning.. in the opposite direction out the door
seen this sort of thing a lot
I get pussy galore, s/o 2 wiz I stay screamin buss down bitch in the crib
n Floss on his way screamin "buss down bitch", no transportation 2 get the kids
coulda been better but i didnt really like the wording in the punchline
Pop ya lid, they know who 2 bid on, u couldn't get ass if u slip em a pill
So he got 2 come on boards sayin "Get at me" cuz NO1 in real life will
this sort of thing been done
again, first bar was okay, second was nice, then you had two played and one that was just kind of awkward. really tough call haha, for me it comes down to the fairly basic floss nameplay vs the fairly basic country nameplay for lotb
pretty close battle, good job guys but i think floss was a lil more effective, i liked the country concept more than any other and that edged it for me but at this point its just preference
v/floss
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