[Adonis]

Mac - First off, the Flow was completely staggered...I want to be nice but i can't and I appologize....The flow was off due to syllable counts being so different, the imagery wasn't all that great, the Rhymes in themselves almost read as forced for the sake of rhyme...express/excess...sure they rhyme, but there was not true emotion I felt when reading the words coupled with the rhymes...I'm not sure how long you've been writing, but this came off as a newer artist not yet wet behind the ears and not experimenting with flow and word usage and syllable counts and shit...IDK...I don't WANT to come off as a dick, and realize I will, so sorry, but if you don't know whats wrong you can't correct it next time.


CDM - I will be over critical with this as well...but will list the things I like later...Flow was decent, not sure how the opening bar truly fit into the piece however. Also I don't know why tears would be "Bittersweet" when a person's wife would die unless they didn't like her, but this was a bit of a love story???

rpg’s beat, upon my home’s bricks as they rocked the sheet

This could have been worded better for flow, but not just that...I assume you meant sheet rock, but i just don't like the line in general...RPG rocked the sheet???? just don't work to me. There were a couple more instinces as this the bold, where it flowed but didn't make the most sense as far as grammar go, but I won't list them.



vote: CDM All in all I feel like his verse was simply superior in every aspect that I look for when I vote....Better flow, better content etc. Neither verse was perfect, mac has potential but came up short this time. While CDM had good flow, decent enough content this verse and not too many slip ups in general.