[Witty]

Split 8 - Wow, you have really elevated since the last time I read one of your pieces, this was written with artistic aplomb and the flow was brilliant from the beginning to the end. It was very poetic, the only gripe I had with it is that at times I thought it was TOO poetic, and I get that the kind of style had in this piece is a style a lot of people here will enjoy, and I do too, but only up to a certain point. There is a line pieces can past when they become too obscure, and for me there were times in this piece when that was the case, I believe that the idea is to communicate and to leave to reader with no doubt about the meaning behind your words. I am nit picking but I feel I have to because in terms of technical ability this was a truly brilliant piece and I just feel with a little more thought for the reader you would have really allowed me to connect more. It felt like you were inside your own head at times, and I was outside looking in through frosted glass...I could see the outline of what you were trying to say but I didn't really understand fully where you were going with it. Again, nit picking, but I do believe it is important to do so. This was brilliant tho, you wrote with great talent and intelligence and you nailed the topic. Very impressed with your technical ability here, you have got so much better in such a short period of time. You're gonna be a force to be reckoned with in the very near future.

Veritas- this was very strong story telling, from beginning to end everything that was happpen was clear and well described. A lot of the time in topical pieces I tend to get lost and lose track of what is actually happening or where the story is going but I didn't get that with this piece, I followed the story from start to finish and thoroughly enjoyed it. about half way through the piece I thought to myself 'Oh, I think this is going to be about the fact that we lock animals in cages while we also live in cages just bigger and without bars' and I thought that was a really cool way to take the topic, and when I got to the end of the piece and that was indeed the moral to the story, I was very content because, even though I had an idea it was coming, you got me there without losing my attention, and you wrapped it up well. A lot of your wording really threw me off tho, it was very awakward a lot of the time, such as ' with urine he would wet it' and 'to educate his take upon the solution.' and that I think was really the main drawback of this piece, it genuinely bothered me quite a lot because I feel, with the story you told so well, just working on your wording really would have made this a beast of a verse, so I was disappointed in that regard. The story you told was very captivating though, and enjoyed it very much.

I have thought about this for the last 10 minutes, I wrote the breakdowns and then read the pieces again, since then I've been sitting here trying to figure out who to vote for. Veritas had a really good piece in terms of the story itself, but I don't think the wording was good enough, and the importance of wording in what we do really can not be stressed enough. On the other hand, Split had the art of technical writing down to a T here, it was really impressive, for me few things are more enjoyable than a piece that is worded to perfection, and so easy to read, there are just a few lines that I thought kept the reader on the outside looking in, in terms of comprehension, while V's brought the reader along for the ride. I think I'm gonna have to go with Split, he had a few obscure lines but I felt he just wrote better. I would not be suprised if V gets more votes tho, this is the closest battle of the first round.

BOTW, easy imo.