Damn bro. This hit hard. I usually just read you in OM so I'm unsure as to whether this is your 'actual' norm or if you really dug deep for this one. Regardless, I really liked this one. You really have a way of putting the reader in the protagonist's shoes. You weaved a well told story, and had the events arranged in a way that kept the story interesting and enthralling. I think the formula got a bit hasty toward the end, how the lines came out a bit hurried and inconsistent with the rest of the piece. Overall though, this was a great JustWrite piece, and you definitely brought it. Good job.
This piece was pretty cool overall. I didn't like the downtrodden terrorist angle, but you write so well I had no choice but like it in its entirety. Your rhyming was complex and your way of storytelling was refreshing, despite me not liking your particular angle. I think the ending could have been a little better but the twist was good, and necessary for such a topic. This was not as original as I'd have wanted, but i was still impressed. Good job Oats.
Overall, i liked both verses. I resonated more with JW, but Oats is clearly a more polished writer when it comes down to mechanics and fine writing. Given the fact that I go with my lasting impressions of writers, MVGT JustWrite.
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Ahem.
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