zyg - i thought this was ripe with a very black humour, supported by a fairly fluid style where the tone seemed mostly conversational, if a touch robotic. not many hiccups here at all really, for me, considering what it was. the bar with sepia didn't rhyme? enunciation, possibly. but yea this was a dope approach and your verse gave it life. i think more than anything i give you points on your approach -- which i really enjoyed, and worked off the picture well. the execution was strong, too, though. good shit.
mord - a solid 'topical'. you're a pretty good writer. you definitely unearthed a few cliches here, and not unlike your competitor you held something of a predictable rhyme scheme. you rhymed more, to your credit. but the setup, technically, was just a bit mundane. i wouldn't mind you branching that out. but that;s me speaking to you as one writer to another -- my advice probably won't help you win 'topical' battles. but yea this was steadfast. because of that i found it a bit dim. not bad writing at all though.
v/zyg
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