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Join Date: Jan 2013
Posts: 3,868
Battle Record: 17-32
Rep Power: 52474192
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Prepare yourself for a TL;DR.
I read up on that shit some time ago and tried it out. (When I read up on shit, I read quite a bit. No books etc., but countless of articles on psychology and whatever dating/PUA gurus have posted as it often holds some substance on the human psyche.) I stopped trying/testing it out because I started to feel unnatural connections to new peers as I noticed this sort of stuff having a greater impact than I first thought. I felt I started getting an unfair advantage in conversations etc., and me not really being real in certain situations. Whether the thoughts/feelings I have about having advantage or not is still something I ponder on though.
It has its positives as well as I manage to balance peoples emotions in group arguements better than before, and find the crucial point that everyone can agree with and leave it to rest even though it might go a little bit against everyone involved's views. I also know a bit more when I should say something and when it wouldn't make a difference. I usually wait until the heated discussion has calmed a bit, and I've learned more about how to understand the thought process to the people involved. Body language is crucial to see when they're open to input, or if it's best to just say ''let's forget about this shit, the next round is on me''.
You can also make almost anyone believe, and even trust, the most crazy far-fetched ideas if presented right by hitting the right buttons, to do this body language and tone (from both) is a must to pay attention to if you want to get anywhere with it. Paying notice to the conversational partners tone and body language is important to see if you get anywhere with what you're saying, and whether or not you should change tactic.
Body language is also a crucial part to know where you stand in terms of women, and whether or not your first impression was good or not. You'll also see whether women/girls like you when/if they choose to play un-interested. If she isn't outspoken about what she thinks, and the body language and tone etc. doesn't really match up it could mean four things; That she isn't sure about you yet (give it some time broheim, but not too much), that she doesn't want to hurt you and wants to keep you at a distance, that she likes attention and likes to be acknowledged and that's it, or that she's interested but it isn't the right time yet. Figuring out which of these it is, and still paying notice to how you act and how she acts, can be the difference between getting it home or not and if it's actually worth your time.
Also, first impression usually starts with your posture and not necessarily the first conversation although that is the breaking point of whether or not you'll keep in touch. Depending on the personality (if it's a girl; is the girl in question relaxed or chill, what is she after and how can you use this? Same thing goes for new people you meet, if you want to keep them at a distance without being rude these small things might keep them away from bulding any further relations with you, but not enough to make them dislike you and vice versa), you can use this to insert some subconscious positives about yourself, or negatives, on anyone. It could go both ways tho', so by keeping that in mind and determining personalities can make things a lot more predictable in terms of where you want to take friendships etc. When to push, and when you shouldn't. Bonding through internal jokes and making it a thing is extremely powerful when meeting new people. Keeping things personal is a great way to get people closer to you if that's what you want.
However, I felt it broke the natural rhythm of friendships, and I felt I managed to manipulate group behavior on a few occasions. Some might even put this in the category of being streetsmart as knowing who to talk to in a group, and who to ignore, is often crucial if you want to get anywhere with your thoughts/ideas or becoming a reference point/leader, and people actually listening to your words and taking it in rather than just forgeting it moments later. Knowing these things can also be the difference between a great and a bad job interview.
Either way all of this led to me questioning whether the relations I created was real, or just a part of me leading people to like me in situations they otherwise might not have. I felt I stopped being ''real'' when I paid notice to these things as I chose different ways of expressing myself and my opinions, so I've quit focusing on it. But there's obvious signs here and there that I still pick up on that's shown to be useful in situations where I'm working as the middleman. I've also been asked to meddle between people, when you reach a point like this you build trust and bonding as well which is essential to healthy friendships.
After I chose to put most of this away it has disrupted some relations to new people, but I feel I'm better off this way as I'm ''myself'' and not some dude that just wants to get along with everyone, or having advantage in terms of girls. I'm definitely more straight forward with my thoughts now than I was a few years ago and I let things go naturally. If it should hurt my shot at women or building new friendships, then so be it. I advice people to keep it natural and not delve too much into the psychology part of group behaviour as it most likely grows on you in a bad way. Why? Although a lot of positive shit comes out of it, it's still not who you really are. So you become what Veritas refers to as a ''loser'', which he's absolutely right about.
I still use it for fun in convos every now and then to mindfuck people as a joke where I take sarcasm/irony to the extremes, but still in a way that doesn't put them off. Being able to determine personalities and their limits is something I still do to understand how far I can take jokes without hurting anyone and still keep a great atmosphere. I actually look upon that as one of my strengths now.
I've managed to make people believe I'm stupid on purpose only to catch them off-guard with thought-out concepts which makes them think my ideas holds any substance on obscure topics. (Like justifying child soldiers, or backing up pseudo-science that homosexuality is a mental disease etc.) In group situations I might make it obvious that I'm joking to spectators/listeners using body language and even get them in on it. It's often humerous and including when we finally break it down. This is mostly effective on people with topics they haven't truly made up their mind about yet, or topics they don't know that much about. But still shit I know enough about to educate with facts. A mix of facts and obscure ideas is the best way to get anywhere with far-fetched sarcasm/irony that's heavily focused on mindfucking/manipulation as the body language you have that's not even visible to the naked eye will still be picked up by whoever you're talking to.
Imo being social sensitive and acting on it almost borders to manipulative behaviour, which in itself isn't cool if you use it to your own advantage. Even if it shouldn't hurt anyone I still find it rather ''fake'' in most situations. I'd rather show what I actually think even if it's kinda ''off'', than having people respect and give cred to someone I'm not (kinda) by using different words, thought out body language to make myself more believable in arguements, or more presentable as a whole. If I start up my own business I'll definitely use it for networking and whatnot though, it's afterall part of the game.
The first and easiest step, that many can do without even knowing the aspects behind it, is the ability to break up arguements and/or possible situations that might escalate in a calm and collected way, being the middleman and finding solutions that all parts agree with when friends disagree and whatnot being socially sensitive is cool. It's about the only thing I respect and can understand its use. Using it to push people you might not like away from the group, or getting women to like you using these methods is something I don't like. I have a huge dislike for the entire PUA-scene as well.
TL;DR: So yeah, I'm able to do it, but I don't 95% of the time because I feel it's a fake thing to do. And I certainly don't use it to get closer to girls beside of obvious flirting etc.
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I'm not a slave for entertainment, I'm entertainments personal slave,
So deep into writing I'm concerned bout the text on my grave.
www.youtube.com/watch?v=gV8ozGcGJ6o
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