Owns shirts that are experiencing a mid-life crisis.
Clean cut greaser. Rolls a pack of American Spirits in his Buckle t-shirts. Doesn't smoke.
Life goal is to become Patches O'houlihan.
His son has never seen the smile Sage Francis has.
Has the facial hair genetics of Elen Degeneres. Less testosterone.
He's been friendzoned by four notebooks.
Prank calls Noodles & Company on Friday Nights, alone.
Looks down on other homeless people who don't use Ikea boxes as a home and Wall Street Journals as shit paper.
He looks stupid.
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Netcees 2025 Revivalist Movement Founder
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