[dead man]

this is obviously a popular battles because of its unconventional matchup. i found it awesome because these two have some discussion history and its rare that those sort of interactions be reflected inside of topical matches, as opposed to battles where discussion posts pretty much dictate how each opponent structures their verse.

veritas made a really risky move here by choosing to not only use the picture as a basis to create a strong narrative, but also as a basis to attack his opponent personally. i think it's apt to ruffle some feathers for "traditionalists" of this type of competition, who are used to seeing one thing and when confronted with another are prone to view it through negative lenses. or even shut it down completely and reject it as something that doesn't fit with their schema of what a top-notch writer's league verse should consist of. however, i think the move veritas made was not only ballsy and original, but also hilarious and consistently entertaining to a degree that many, most, verses i've read fail to achieve. again, it was a risk, but in my opinion, it paid off here. like someone said, if you replaced 'Rawn' with any number of alternate subjects of this trip through delusional grandeur, it would still stand solid as a dope verse. so the way i see it, it makes no sense to discredit the quality of the work itself based on that aspect of it's identity.. it was a niche, it's humor, it's personality.. that said, it's a direction that could only be executed successfully under very specific circumstances and does not fit all occasions. but it worked this week, and i commend veritas for taking that risk..

there are obviously areas where the writing in itself was a bit of an underachievement. i'm partial to a more literary approach but to each his own..



RAWN went with a more reflective approach, from the standpoint of an artist who struggles to put that flashbulb memory on the canvas. i think this spoke volumes in a broader sense than taken at face value. that struggle to come to terms with aging, the change of the scenery, the fading of vital faculties and a host of sociological possibilities. i think my main complaint stems from the fact that you really did not touch upon the transition period for this man. he is here, he is living in squalor, attempting this masterpiece before he reaches death -- but WHY. what is the purpose, what are his driving motives, his energies, his focus? what are his intentions? the snapshots of present contrasted with the past create a solid distinction and give us a pretty clear view of what you're communicating.. but without your own angle on the CHANGE.. its hard for me to feel it.. paralysis was interesting, agoraphobia, i take that as a growing tendency for humans to interact less and less with other humans as modernity progresses.. these are all cool ideas but there was no growth for them here, no closure, only openings. i thoroughly enjoyed how you decided to make this work, but it ended up falling flat for me, ultimately. if you had wrote more, or even dedicated your writing to a more focal construction of this man and his painting.. i would have to grant you this battle based on concept alone. however, everything above aside, veritas managed to genuinely shock me with his contribution this week (something that so rarely happens) where i think he was not only underrated but misunderstood..

for these reasons, i have crunchy dick mouse taking this battle by a slim margin..

tough call, and it may be unpopular, but i votes em how i sees em..

v/ VERITAS