[Adonis]

Oh my fuckin bitch ass happy hands
Just broke down a very good vote on phone and closed the thread before clicking save


Inno - I'm going. To try and remember what. I said to you, so it might be jumbled, sorry.

I really did hate the first couple verses I read from you season 1, the improvement is exponential. Although you absolutely erk me grammaticallyy, the line by line concepts and writers voice out shines most of the wrong you do produce. One word of advice. I really think you would benefit from expanding on indivdual bar concepts instead of moving on so quickly. What I mean is, if you are explaining a flame fleeting the mountian side, don't just move on. Spend an extra bar or two going in depth. The poetic feel you contain is stronng, and explaining the details I personally think would help you shine. You fairly vague most of the time, and I think this might mask, or rather simply improve your style. IDK, I had a bunch more in my break down of yours that I forget. But I'll be honest, most of it was simply me telling how much I think you've improved and continue improving. It might be slow steps, but from last season to now I really do think you've grown better by miles. Also, I can say with a straight face in pure honest opinion, your verses have the most potential out of any competitor. If you can just hone that thought process and find a way to get what your trying to say out a bit more clearly; I really do think you could become an even darker horse.

MW- so I've heard you say in magg or even in random convo's about how you've been choosing to sacrifice you rhyme scheme or structure for content. But I've personally never seen you drop anything like this, so I didn't believe you and you provved me wrong,or proved yourself right I guess?? Anyways, with that said, the flow wasn't perfect or anything, but it is much improved from the simple structure you've been posting which I'm not a fan of. One thing you struggled with here is the transitions from one end rhyme to the next. Just seemed a bit off to me

Vote mike

Overall a. Better verse imo