[PancakeBrah]

You're shifting goalposts right now.

I suggest we hold a Cake v. NYC decathalon.

1. Handball
2. Hockey
3. Basketball
4. Powerlift
5. Half-marathon
6. MMA Match
7. Arm Wrestling
8. Discus
9. Long Jump
10. Discussion/Boarding

My prediction: You win the first three. Plus long jump. You lose, by a wide margin, in the other six.

Afterwards I give you a firm and hearty handshake with sincere eye contact that speaks "You're a worthy competitor; but don't ever get uppity again." We then dominate all of the bars in your lower-middle class part of New York, with the obvious end game being impregnating all races of women.