maybe if i rearranged the structure it'd be easier. i know you guys like a certain amount of syllables to each line and usually about 7-10 words in each stanza is preferable to a reasonable ratio of syllables. it's likeable, easy to read, and well just has appeal in terms of, if you lack a certain literary composite, you can make it up with ease of depth
actually i just changed a few lines, and added different words, and shortened syllables, i guarantee you, it reads better. if it doesnt ill give you your money back @
Vulgar @
Certain