[Certain]

ZYG: Your approach to this strange genre of poetry is the most interesting I've seen. I skimmed through the voters' explanations before even beginning my own, just to see if they tackled your unique indifference to rhyme scheme, rhyme depth and cadence. They didn't, and I think that comes largely because the three votes come from three members very familiar with your approach and your vast abilities.

We all know you basically can outrhyme any of us. Your ability with any style has been well-documented. That rightfully gives you a bit of leeway in crafting your own, highly original style. I think this style works because it puts the emphasis on the content even more than a more straightforward style, such as Mike Wrecka's. Your thoughts are on display clearly, and when they're as unique as they were in this verse, that works.

But I do wonder if they couldn't be presented in a cleaner manner from a prosaic perspective. I have less of a problem with the "internal gasceous sacs" line that ran ridiculously long than I do with this turn of phrase: "all their internal organs are fully collapsed all of the time." The wording there is sloppy and overly wordy, as though you're trying to stuff extra syllables in just to avoid having too many lines in a row that work with a semi-conventional cadence. I know research papers often are wordy, but "their internal organs are collapsed all of the time" would have worked and kept things moving a bit better. Your redundancies are my biggest complaint about your style: "inaudible sonar," "lifetime" twice in the same line, a heavy use of -ly adverbs, etc. I think to really maximize this style, cleaner writing (and grammar, for the record) would be a big plus.

But I liked this verse, mostly because the entire concept is remarkably creative. Going against Genocide, who tends to take the straight line when available, this kind of twisted concept was really smart. You broke down in simplified but not simple terms the existence of two forms of life that don't actually exist, then a third that does. I was particularly impressed by your representation of evolution. And your writing, redundancies aside, was very clear and instructive. The matter-of-fact tone fit here in a way it doesn't always. You know what you're doing.

Genocide: It's incredible how deep the contrast is in this battle. Your verses in this league have been nothing but emotion and flow. That's right in your wheelhouse as much as writing about science is in ZYG's. But this verse seemed a bit contrived to me. Taking the aggressive stance toward the pregnancy could have been interesting as a start, but you never really moved beyond it. That made this feel like one note and didn't give it the emotional depth that last week's much better verse (which would have worked for this topic, though not quite as direclty) showed.

All that could be overlooked if the writing were a bit more inspired, though. And that's where I think this verse really fell short. When you're working with a well-worn topic, you have to come up with something new or unique to say, but even your violent imagery was rather standard fare. The rhyme scheme was actually stripped down from what I'm used to for you, though the flow remained very fluid aside from the line beginning with, "The adversary she is," which didn't work and clunked things up right as I was finding a rhythm. The best line in the verse was about the ovulation app, which was one of the few moments you allowed yourself to get specific.

What you had here was basically a writer well-versed in angry writing, leaning on his crutch. And that's a shame because even if you weren't a fan of the picture for whatever reason, I think it suited you. You showed last week that you can write about paternity and fatherhood well, and this was a case where you didn't need to go outside of yourself and still could have won this battle. But you seemed to be uninspired, and it showed. I really disliked the last line, even knowing your tendency to break the fourth wall in verses. Blaming a bad topic always is lame, but blaming a bad topic in your actual verse is particularly lame, especially when the topic isn't bad.

Vote: ZYG