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Old 09-27-2013, 08:16 PM   #5
Dove Dozer
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Dove Dozer has a brilliant futureDove Dozer has a brilliant futureDove Dozer has a brilliant futureDove Dozer has a brilliant futureDove Dozer has a brilliant futureDove Dozer has a brilliant futureDove Dozer has a brilliant futureDove Dozer has a brilliant futureDove Dozer has a brilliant futureDove Dozer has a brilliant futureDove Dozer has a brilliant future
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Athiest - Solid verse here. vocab was excellent. technically I found it lacking. However extremely descriptive making it for a very interesting enjoyable read. with a little technical flair to your verses I think you would be much more of a threat here. just my opinion. good verse.

Patrown - tight lines, your flow was nice. great wording, showing that bars can be short and say lots.

men succumbing to the times, forever humbled.

^ niiiiice..

a few really nice quotable lines in here. short and sweet, but nailed in perfect.

Vote - Patrown. I felt he just edged this with a tighter flowing verse, which with all aspects combined gave his verse a little more oomph.

props to both.
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