[PancakeBrah]

I had the start of my feed worded perfectly then erased it. :-( I'll try to recreate.

First impression; I really liked the title before I read the piece. By dropping the 's' on that turn of phrase you made it your own and gave the reader a preconception on the voice and angle of the piece. Strong titling.

"Love's best a past tense romance. Remember that.
Any ember fanned expands dreadfully; potential to entrance;"

I didn't like the first line. The wording was off to me. There are two options to look at in critiquing this first line; taking the grammar as it's true meaning and having redundancy trying to pass as meaning (love's best/past tense romance) or having the line add a 'as' before the 'a' and still not being all too effective. The first thought in the second line, though, is a great metaphor. It's physically true and sentimentally correct with extremely crisp and concise wording that cuts to the truth. I almost wish you had reworded this couplet around that ('Any ember fanned expands dreadfully' if I'm not clear) and focused the rhyme and sentiment around it. You technically did, but the first line was off to me. 'Potential to entrance' makes sense in keeping with the 'dreadfully' thought but it's just there to continue an already well made thought and complete the rhyme.

"Damn."

It seems like a weird thing to like, but I did enjoy this. Good use of transition, space, and tonality.

"A collapse as elegant as ever, scrap the leavening,
enhancing reverie like youth face against a window pane."

I liked this.

-pre ninja edit

I re-read this piece a couple times. I'm horrible at gleaning meaning from pieces, especially something abstract like this. I usually assume the mundane. I initially thought this was another relationship reflection, dour and all. But the more I read this the more it read as a reflection on writing and maybe even text specifically. And your style, at least in this piece, was far from 'standard' text format. The lines of (we'll sail to no avail), midas and ink wells, and epistles bring me to this conclusion. I could be 100% wrong. But then again, this was the meaning I took from the writing so to me it's correct. This can't be broken down in usual terms; the writing was very fluid and almost not-give-a-fuck in terms of the norm. I though the wording and vocabulary was precise and necessary and I loved the ending.