[Mike Wrecka]

sick battle dudes

pent uppers - really like this piece. it was extremely descriptive. you created characters and gave them all personalities and backgrounds. which is dope. i have to say the story progressed well, and i understood where it was going the whole way but i was a little confused about the narrator character. who was he exactly, why was he with these people and what did he want from them was not clear to me. which detracted from the otherwise great storytelling. maybe i missed it, i read it once but it should be clear to me and its not. structure wise , it was really good, especially considering the storytelling content of it. good work

nigam - really liked that obscure and abstract first stanza as an introduction. you had the big reveal that we were reading the story of columbus from the indians perspective at just the right moment. i actually went back and re read from that la nina line and it was even better. you structure and flow changed sometimes drastically between stanzas and i didnt like that so much. but i really like the concept and it was well done. compliant is that you went very abstract on a real and well known topic, which i liked alot , but you made the piece to long. an abstract storytelling piece like this needs to be a bit shorter because after a while it all started seeming just vague. and meaningless. which i know it wasnt but towards the end it felt like it. but two thumbs up dude good job


real close battle. pents better format and complex structure and character development, vs nigs better concept and at times beautiful way to describe things we all know so well

fuck iono really i gotta go with pents, it didnt have as many flaws. it was more consistent. nigmas had some spots i didnt love. thanks for the reads fellas

vote- pents