Judgement
My mind shattered into pieces and I fell on both knees crying
atop fallen shards of daggers, trenched omniscient and implying
knowledge of myself. Of my hurting, my lying, its cheating pendants
that's all I seemed to do and I was exposed, under red fluorescent
a pungent reminder of the medicinal properties of karma
its chemicals and articulation, stitching my hearts fall
Lacerations etched a maze of blisters on my sunlit body
and I couldn't feel them. I was euphoric from the punishment probably
and I chased the high again and again, shooting up its ornate arrow
its feathers flared out of my existence, its tip a sharp soothing voice
of good company and shoestring comforts, coolly poised
it contracted a smile from me, amusing my lipid shackles
an inner Jackal laughing insipidly, choking on erratic crackles
it resonated throughout my circuitry of unabated servitude
just now tasting the fruit of my labor, fully ripe it knew
I reached one arm up and held on for another first day
When the world felt correct and so thirsty someway
Or any other conviction of universal truth
So orderly and prescribed and very vital
to my own deception
I saw the distant churning and turning
of clumsy vultures circling and swerving
consistent random patterns in the sky
I knew then I was their fertile soil, once I die
I felt un-proportionally top heavy and thought
a map of redemption could find me and be caught
or be found if I swayed against them long enough
for more time to play my last card, a two of jaded hearts
desperation's only hope, blindly bluffing a fools baited dart
I envisioned their hooks clamping down
on my leathery flesh, blood damp and brown
shampooed and conditioned into soft raw material
As imperial as the true color of eternal sun shine
I clenched my teeth, waiting for the interval pain to subside
waiting for the last call...
And so I faced my Judgement over and over
chasing my own sins around and around again
but never quite getting anywhere beyond
the Saviors soothing hand, grabbing at straws
because the Devil was sort of behind him, pulling
but ahead now, controlling in a relative way
and while I fell into lucid dreams
and lost all to irrational fantasy
he never spoke again with much words to say
content that I will suffer a life times worth
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