Of the three-or-so verses I've read by you, this is definitely my favorite. You had some things to get off your chest on this topic, and it really showed. The rhymes were fun and all, but I liked this verse more when you backed off a little bit (though you never fully took your foot off the gas with the rhymes, which is appreciated).
Quote:
don’t be so damn frail…
a proud parent doesn’t always have a sound marriage but live it right
find your courage & give it might, ignite your purpose & give it light
eye to eye you must learn to synchronize…
hope you’re thinking twice before your next move
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I loved that message of parental harmony. It's important for a child to not just have two parents but to have a set of parents, working together. This verse is worthwhile and positive and really well done.
As far as criticism, the line starting with "fan males" stood out for the wrong reasons, and I wish you had gone a little deeper with rhymes instead of backing off after each couplet. Obviously, that can be a challenge when you're using so many internal rhymes, but it would have been nice to see you mix it up a bit more.
This was very good, though.