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Old 07-18-2013, 11:02 PM   #17
CymbiCort
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YDK, I was really feeling your imagery in the first 3 bars. Your flow was on point too. was really natural, i didn't really see any forces. but some of your lines, you got of rhymed better to make more sense. (Example: When you rhymed ambition with ambitious) but overall , it was good and the rhyme scheme was pretty nice along with the structure. was an enjoyable read overall.
I felt you could of stook the picture a little more. You started off good then you kind of tapered off during the end, bu t i still get where you were coming from.



Tyson, your verse didnt read as good to me as YDKs to be quite honest. I also wasn't feeling some of your lines at all (Exaggerate the enigmas like if aliens where to exist
Then their "superior" intellect would trample our IQs, u silly pessimist ) could of done way more with that imo. YDK didn't have any stretched bars, with the exception of a few stretched concepts he had that could of been reworded.
Tyson lost on structure, flow, and rhymes. Imagery is a tie, both had ups and downs. Tyson had the punchlines but this is a topical.

overall, i preferred YDKs verse. It was just overall written better and easier for one follow, and stood to the image as good as tyson... if not, better.

V/YDK
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