Muah!
 

I love my bitch, servin me grub on fresh plates and platters.
Plus, she sucks my dick until the cum changes states of matter.
With a glowing, red-hot dick head, I bone her beastly
Tryna get it till it cooks her ovaries over easy.
Each egg's like a breakfast snack, but bloody.
Oh buddy, I beat the crap out of that infected snatch.
I'm pumping fast. It's out of this world. My dick's in orbit.
Shit, she kills it. Then I let her fuck it rigamortus.
Sit on my face. I want to be waterboarded.
A tongue so sharp, when I start, you'd think she got aborted.
I'm on her to force in this foreskin until it tears open.
Hopefully it stops at the ball seam. I'm scared, stroking
Like I was epileptic. My cock foaming at the mouth.
I plug it shut. My balls inflate and I am floating now.
Let her lick my ass while she's jerking it too.
Her tongue slidin through my bowels and playing peekaboo dude;
It sticks out real quick, from the tip of my dick
If I spot it, and grip it, then I'm the shit and I win!
Put my hand in her puss. Tryna push out her navel.
I succeed in my endeavour and achieve what is fabled.
Orgasm. Her spasms run deep as a chasm.
So deep in her throat, she's basically eating my ass. Yum.

You might be spending too much time around @CopyPat. This verse was excellent, though. The rhymes were fresh, and the humor actually was funny. I'm not sure how I'd prefer to hear this rapped: A deadpan style could work, but the humor might be better with a more goofy, off-center delivlery. There were a couple of bumps that I think would be evident upon edit, but these were my favorite sections:

haha certain how did u know??

dope shit OBV

sucked. maybe if u were better itd be good

This was dope, I liked it a lot.

You can do better tho.

True

FIG, WHO DO YA LOVE?/...

I thought this was pretty cool.

I've not viewed raps or poems about dirty sexuality in this manner.

I give a thumbs up.




props to @Certain for giving honest and detailed reviews of users' posts.

omg

This was my favorite part great word play and rhyme scheme.

"Plus, she sucks my dick until the cum changes states of matter.
With a glowing, red-hot dick head, I bone her beastly
Tryna get it till it cooks her ovaries over easy.
Each egg's like a breakfast snack, but bloody.
Oh buddy, I beat the crap out of that infected snatch.
I'm pumping fast. It's out of this world. My dick's in orbit.
Shit, she kills it. Then I let her fuck it rigamortus."

disturbing.
when you lick her out she thinks she was aborted?
Oh i get it a tounge so sharp...(I went back and reread it)
still disturbing

...
Nah this is awful
I dont wanna know about yout dick