My Ridiculous Pantomime.
 

there aint a fuckin thing in my life's been easy
no father, no mother, no advice to teach me
no priest could reach me, catholic school til 3rd grade
hatred in my heart, why am i here in the first place
ignoring my birthday, like fuck the fact i ever made it
thanks mom, for leaving me in a world this complicated
this monster matrix, waved n said goodbye to ur obligation
your son, who's suicidal thoughts are not the safest
stomp the pavements, gave my shoes and socks abrasions
kicked rocks and skated, now i pray to my father satan
a rotten waste, who'll rock the nation like tectonic plates did
drugs made me vomit, face itched, but it calmed my patience
if i could take my life, erase it, i would like to shape shift
liquid inside of a lifeless basin, water always finds a righteous way in
excitements played, and im on a flight towards famous
somehow i'ma rite these wrongs, while i write insane shit
cause back to basics, im basically still lost in the world
nauseous, searchin' for some kind of awesome referral
to get me off of this circle, before i jump from its cliff's
the difficulties of it, unequipped, i cant stomach this shit
if i should plummet and live, broken, busted to bits
my shame would eat me alive, and id be covered with it
no comfort in this, knowing another fail has arrived
should i comply and move forward? set sail, or deny?
once met another sailor, he died, couldn't keep the failure alive
it was my father, im his genetically embarrassed design
took an oath there by his side, dead in his casket
passed the day before i graduated rehab, that i would never relapse -quit
i lied, i couldn't keep up, im a devilish ass kid
who lays in the bed that he's made, i could never relax in
so my clever reaction's, get drunk enough to arrest
i did it last saturday, my life is just... fucking a mess
i dont know if im one of the best, or just the worst at juggling stress
so im coming of age, where i feel like nothing can save me
death excites, miss my father, and i wanna be pain free
but someone detains me, and its my beautiful daughter
she's only one of two, but keeps me true to my karma
im selfish, stupid, and caught up in a hell of a storm
i walk around butt naked, tho my umbrella is worn
the sting of the swarm, of these bees i've pissed off
are the reason these songs are frequently a sick blog
if i could criss cross the clock, and turn back the hands of time
then maybe satan wouldn't dance to my ridiculous pantomime

Cool enough, enjoyed sections of it, ending was dope af. Dope that you're writing some true shit though, but reading it is rather meh in the long run to me even though the flow is aiight. Split it up into 2-3 verses, create a hook and spit it over an ill beat. Pretty certain that if you do that it will make this shit at least ten times better.

Keep doing you.

this is like tyler the creators bastard if tyler was literate, and i mean that in the best way.

:(

hey, sometimes i just gotta get shit out and it doesnt always become a masterpiece when im through. thanks for reading folks. appreciate it anyway

im not saying it wasn't a quality bit of rhyme work. it was.

it just made me sad. which is either the result of my over empathic sensibilities or your ability to communicate a poignant emotional state in verse. let's simply settle for a bit of both.

thanks geno.

it took it as such @black. y/w bro

I agree with objective. Spit it and this would be great, especially the sections where you talk about your father. I relate to this. This wasn't as technically as impressive as I've seen you write but this was honest like the last few pieces you've dropped. I dig it.

You my boy, Geno.