Netcees - Old Piece, First week in the RSTL after long hiatus

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- - Old Piece, First week in the RSTL after long hiatus (http://netcees.org/showthread.php?t=6374)

Old Piece, First week in the RSTL after long hiatus

Old piece. can't believe it won lol

Your Dark Fantasy isn't as cracked up as you thought it would be....

Up against the wall, feel like I'm bout to fall/
About to crawl across stage, a dozen feet tall/
The crowd is so loud my thoughts wander/
Long enough to ponder, my last trip to the mall/
Quite a haul, like I tried to buy it all/
Bought all the shit she saw but she still ain't tryna call/
I gotta win them from kingpins and Princes/
Hence, my swag is so distinct, for instance/
My own clothes line/design my own shoe, too
Who knew I'd go platinum, 4 times?/
I did, I insist, too bad for my fifth/
My mom's eyelids closed, I suppose since she died-its/
So silent, the walls vibrate, when I strike with my fists/
Until my cries quit, and then a beat emerges/
Stay up all night and sing till sleep determines/
Play up the violin strings, then each resurgence/
of drums mixed with 808 hummed reverb hits/
Then scribble the lyric before the tears dry up/
Call Chanel Iman, invite her, to Milan, we fly up/
Eager to see her in the new Yves St. Laurent/
Too damn bad they turned me back at Balmain/
Avant garde apparrel and they still dare to spurn me/
Don't they know I'm back from the dead – Pharoah's journey?/
Thought my career was on a downward spiral/
But even my meltdown was turned into a viral/
I've apologized a hundred times on my Twitter too/
Damn, White America, why can't I just get rid of you?/
So I diss one of your idols, the truth gotta hurt/
Don't bother me, I cop a new Prada shirt/
With some Gucci jeans, and the Nike's too/
And see if Devon Aoki'd be my wifey-boo/
Just for a night or two, see, that's my life man/
Ex fiance cancelled up all my wife plans/
I even wrote some songs about how it was difficult/
But critics' cynical, I even kept a quote:/
[I]My “ego is a roadblock”, “nothing ve done is private”/
My music's “clumsy and underfed”, guess they didn't like it/
They didn't say it for my first three records/
Its not the first time I've heard dis-re-specters/
Told my flow was froze, stay behind the scenes/
Afraid that I would die before I'd find my dreams/
Then the crash happened, I doubted my survival/
Started rap's revival, sometimes i'm suicidal/
But I will keep preachin to these demons like the bible/
Louis Vuitton Don, Christian Dior disciple/
How you gonna tell me that I'm not the Bes – Oh Shit!/
LADIES and GENTLEMAN.... KANYE WEST!!

http://l.yimg.com/bt/api/res/1.2/w1C...est_070432.jpg

lol writ mostly to the beat of "So Appalled" from the new album, My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy

Lol this was actually pretty great. It felt like it was straight from Yeezys head.

Quote:

Thought my career was on a downward spiral/
But even my meltdown was turned into a viral/
I've apologized a hundred times on my Twitter too/
Damn, White America, why can't I just get rid of you?/
So I diss one of your idols, the truth gotta hurt/

The more meaningful introspective moments of the piece were best, especially when the subject of his mom was covered. It was soaked into morbidity just the right amount.

It ended pretty weak imo, the beginning and middle section were best. Pretty unique drop though

lol @ thinking ill read a centered verse.

nothanksjeff

@cakecakecake i can uncenter it if you'd like.

But...

I have a feeling you would still not read it :/

And yes @Figurative this verse came after maaaany moons of not having written anything and really being inspired by Yeezy's DarkFantasy album. Gotta get back to bumping that shit, it puts me in the right mood to write dope shit, thanks again for looking out and Imma keep an eye out for your work as well, friend.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Darth Yoda (Post 57960)

hey.

cake is a narrow-minded, no-showing, armpit shaving, pseudo-intellectual saying prisoner of consciousness and his opinion should be taking with a grain of salt smaller then his steroid shrunken genitalia.

This piece was pretty tight, deff had the audio feel reminiscent of the OG gayfish. Felt you rocked the style nicely, would be interesting to hear the audio for this. The Kanye vibe feel really made lines that would otherwise be mediocre stand out to me. An example would be the dis-re-spected bar. Nice drop, pcelates

This was pretty dope. I thought you rocked the topic nicely too. Nice flow to this forreal. I also think this had a real audio vibe to it and would love to hear this over a beat.

Good stuff. Very dope

Sorry it took me so long to get around to this. It's been a busy fucking week. Anyway after reading this and I enjoyed the piece, but looking at your shit you write now you've progressed so god damn far man lol. Bent's a beast.
But to the feed on this piece specifically, excellent flow audio esque type of piece which would probably sound pretty damn good to a beat if you ask me. Great little excerpts of personal shit were my favorite just like Fig pointed out. All in all Bent a pretty good drop man. Drop some more OM's man.

Didnt get a lot of the references because I don't listen to Kanye...maybe my only thing I didn't like about it...Maybe dub it down a little bit for the people like me...I got some of it don't get me wrong but didnt quite get all of it...So tbh I don't really know if u gave urself away or not...Also not really sure if u were going that route...If u were lol I had no clue until the end...

This was pretty good like everyone else has said...Everything was up to par with some nice concepts in there...Vocab was pretty good and u defly showed ur knowledge and the topic at hand...I wasnt blowed away by it but a decent read nonetheless...

Just not my style I guess but for what it was it was good...kept my attention through out and there's no reason to un-center ur verse... A lot of narrow minded dudes on here...Sometimes it does look tacky I will say but here it's fine because u used a pic...makes it look Better IMO if u center a verse around a pic...

Good shit