Splitflex
 

I'm too lazy for enter keys, my irradiant energy's of the craziest pedigree. I blame my ancestry's path of descendants for the haphazard manner I was slapped on this planet. I practically shifted every stick off the freefall, laugh if you get it... I like rap and progressive, cruise cars on the beach with the seagulls. And subtext. I like movie stars, spooge drenched. When I party with goofies, spark- and go full retard... I lewd text a slew of dumb exes. I'm not thirsty, I'm fuckin dressed as a bougie narc, I'm truly parched, I'm grooving with the tunes set to weirdly rude questions. Even a crumb or two gets these sloots pecking, coo coo. Not leaving with the coupe empty. Moonroof. The roof's setting. Mary Poppins, poppin molly, rolling mary. I meditate, palms are staring, concentrate, solemn state, overbearing on my swag chakra. Why would I separate, tags, in commas, if Banksy don't? Cats OBEY like fad-hoppers, badly clothed like ratchet hoes in plaid rompers, you lack proof of action-combat, your stats useless, your walk-to-talk is Jap movement in fashion watches. I'll spit at you and you'll disintegrate. The residues a googol centigrade. Flee in a black chopper with rental plates that doesn't hover but levitates, Master Roshi, y'all grasshoppers, pack of locusts on which the mantis preys. Bragadoccious. I got slants for days.

was garbage until

Why would I separate, tags, in commas, if Banksy don't? Cats OBEY like fad-hoppers, badly clothed like ratchet hoes in plaid rompers, you lack proof of action-combat, your stats useless, your walk-to-talk is Jap movement in fashion watches. I'll spit at you and you'll disintegrate. The residues a googol centigrade. Flee in a black chopper with rental plates that doesn't hover but levitates, Master Roshi, y'all grasshoppers, pack of locusts on which the mantis preys. Bragadoccious. I got slants for days.

all of that was actually funny/sick

i literally lol'd at banksy don't... cool parody

RTF: http://netcees.co/showthread.php?t=63323

Didnt think the piece digm quoted was the highlight. It all read pretty leveraged. The qualm with paragraphs is the way it reads and since it's not set up in a stanza that there leaves less and less room for a standard 1-2 line/punchline set-up form. Many people don't like this because usually the idea of constantly rhyming is deemed easy by them, and doesnt take much effort. This was cool.

This was better than paradigm's part in the collab..

master roshi / pack of locusts / bragadocious.

nice

for some reason i expect your writing to begin reflecting a more progressive rap type of style. a la chance and vic. aka my city's personality.

i sort of liked this but i have definitely seen you do better both rhythmically and conceptually. this felt a bit lackluster like you were trying to take it somewhere it just wasn't ready to go. the effort and intention was there but the execution sort of lagged for me. but it was fun to read and its nice to see you even writing and posting again since your impromptu hiatus. there were some dope segments like he googol centigrade that actually taught me something. the way you spelled bourgeois killed me though. i guess its pronounced differently but idk. anyway come home soon g. grease your wheels. but i understand priorities are what they are.


see you around splitoris


1

Lmao bougie is northern slang

I will get you all back

Wow Split, this was very impressive. The amount of wordplay you had was incredible. Very well thought out lines with a purpose. Also tons of rhyme slanting which was enjoyable, very bragadoccia as you stated. Everything worked together on this and contributed to the overall feel of what I think you were going for. Good display of skill, the booth needs you to write more often in this section. Very good piece, Split.

except it wasn't.

The ending was way too sudden. You were gaining momentum and beginning to find a voice, though it still wasn't exactly clear what that voice would entail. Then the verse just ended. The beginning was a little rough, like you were settling in and again a bit unsure of what you were writing compared to your more conceptual stuff. This was OK.