check me out
 

my mind gon crazy.. my nine off safety,
ya so wack das y ya grind dont phase me,
dont talk shit everyone respectin me for spittin,
3 shots like a hat trick u get a penalty for trippin,
i keep hintin at yall women n all dem sluts is lovin it,
ill take ur bitch home like im the fuckin government,
n wen i fucked the bitch i made sure that i came fast,
aint worth my time she take more trains then train tracks,
i break cash with the best of them u just estrogen,
big fat pussy watch how i beef with the rest of them,
have yall watchin over ya back wen i go and get steal,
have u runnin on the spot just like a treadmill,
the lead fill all of u haters for startin talkin shit shit,
ill pop a clip n drop the bitch who wanna rock wit dis,
if u fuck with drugs, holla u know i got the product,
i got H 2 O's but u know i aint talkin water, HOLLA

somethin light let me kno wuts good im new here...

Not bad, you took subject matter I generally despise and made it somewhat entertaining. Flow was on point, I'd like to see you write about something other then bitches guns and money though

word up im a street dude so in freestyles thats usually wut i rap about but i appreciate that...

for off the top freestyle.. or better yet keystyle lol it was pretty good.
i agree with the other dude about rapping about other content, but like you said a street dude can only rap about what he knows, ig i would focus more on your trials and tribulations.. shit youve been through

keep postin though nigga.

Its gully, on some corner cypher session type shit. Get focussed and think your concepts out a little more. I'm sure you can put together some ill street shit if you dig a little deeper. This is basic to me, but a good way to start and open up. Stay active

appreciate it... like i said it was a freestyle i might have hit the backspace key 2 or 3 times u know wut im sayin? a couple of them punchlines i got memorized but i wanted yall to see wut my style was like... punchline street rapper. I signed up for that big tourni so ima spit fire in that, appreciate the love tho.

like everyone's been saying, solid first drop, all the mechanics are there for sure. looking forward to seeing how this translates into shit you sit down and think about.

an fyi great way to get feedback is to feed other dudes drops and as them to return the favor.

You've got the basics down like all the other guys have said. Keystyle I'm guessin which isn't bad I suppose. Not bad would rather see what a more thought out verse looked like.

Now go drop feed on other people's posts or I'm closing this thread.

the only reason i came here was cuz a dude i kno thru internet told me this site needs better rappers so i came. I duno y u would want to close this thread cuz i got skill that was a freestyle... but if everytime i drop a verse on here its gonna get deleted theres no point of me being here. your call.

You act like I'm being a dick. I said if you don't feed other posts I'm closing this, it's the rules. I'm not singling you out.

i bin here for 2 days tho i havent looked round the site yet... let me breathe dog.

yo this was mad cool lol, the flow/ schemes were real nicely set up and read off really well, easily your strong suit. read like a Meek Mill track almost haha. maybe edit/ check your concepts a bit more, thought the closer was like well done but also kinda cornball. good drop tho

keep keying

lol, this was grimey man. I feel like youre a spitter, arent you? Yeah, this is definitely something that would get rapped, and I cant hate then man. Flow was pretty sweet, just work on your concepts man.

i like the freestyle atmosphere this thing brings..def would like to hear more of your shit on audio tho, it would add to some of the more "basic" concepts through your delivery and all that extra shit

noticed that its hard to get much respect doing this through text, where more technical lyrical stuff is expected