dead man - DELIRIUM
 

stop





underneath the fridge, watch delirium leak
bare to the teeth. read carefully: it's heroin chic
americana, black piranha, mantra monster lagoon
i'm sinking slowly cause its hurts to refuse. purchasing truth
in sandwich baggies. laugh sadly. boxed lunches for 2
throwing bricks in lieu of anything constructive to do
poetic waste of a mood. broadband beatnik, sensitive muse
it's expertise. not exercise like english assumed
triple six-pack abuser. chronic alcoholic approved
she was a lover of many, friend and daughter of few
rosebud modeling moves, cheekbones blossoming blooms
breathing white november winds. dark skin softer than june
i'm a junky in a suit. space-age saucer recluse
nose-deep in ketamine and metropolitan news
aggressive conquerer. benign tumor, pre-operative room
postdoctorate, your honor with tautological blues
modus operandi, let the drama resume
i've got nothing left to lose. only coffins to use
and i've realized, it's constant. it's a pang, it's an island
umbrellas for the pain. it's the rain, it's dysthymic
cellophane bag supplier. see-thru, sinful as priests
system delete. my room is filthy, but my whiskey is neat
distant and deep. mysterious freak, closing the door
born to drink and reproduce and love and divorce
i'm not accustomed to more so what else more could be said
heart of stone, lungs of coal below a porcelain head
social resentment like schizoaffective distress
toulouse-lautrec the resurrect. wet corpse of a sketch
metamorphic descendant of some glorious presence
gorged out in western cinema what nordics invented
rhyme contortionist message code allegorical sentence
fuck categorical spectrums. the only one important is preference
endorsement at checkers. sizzled beef and chocolatey shakes
Chicagoan with property in Hoffmann Estates
if addiction is religion then i'm awfully late
i've died with needles hanging from my arms at the stake
let's all band together for camaraderie's sake
build ourselves a bridge, jump and drown in the lake
greet love, but welcome hate - let them mingle and meet
turn off that fucking television and read





go

Bravo

@Certain @Eŋg

Ok I like this one, in the other old piece I bumped I was talking about me not liking the set you free one you did, it just isnt up to the usual standard I hold for you. This piece was nice though. I really liked poetic waste of a mood, that was just a great thought. The born to reproduce lanve and divorce one was funny too seeing as thats what I did haha. Anyways yea man props. Another fire piece to your already awesome archive of awesomeness.

I'll try to get this tonight. Should have some time.

Black,

I always enjoy reading ur stuff...

but this was real dope man...

real clean, flow wise and thought transitions.

the brevity of what ur saying, and how u say it...its a true credit to u as a writer.

'she was a lover of many, friend and daughter of few
rosebud modeling moves, cheekbones blossoming blooms
breathing white november winds. dark skin softer than june
i'm a junky in a suit. space-age saucer recluse
nose-deep in ketamine and metropolitan news
aggressive conquerer. benign tumor, pre-operative room
postdoctorate, your honor with tautological blues
modus operandi, let the drama resume
i've got nothing left to lose. only coffins to use' - was probably the highpoint for me...with the contrasts, juxtapositions, thought leads and transitions...just a real nice excerpt imo

i also liked the room filthy/whisky neat line too...

but yeah man..def a good read, and deserves more feed.

stay at it.

fuck bwahah

OK, I read it. There's a lot of cool phrasing in this one, along with your patented silky flow. But I think it lacked the thread running through it that I find in your strongest work. There were times when the references were so purposefully vague that it reminded me of Split Eight's writing here. I don't have much more to say, so I'll just quote a few lines I liked.

i've got nothing left to lose. only coffins to use

oh, word - i liked that line. it was arrogant. but not, because it IS expertise... even though it's still an exercise. lol. thx! i'll be back, on an overdue feeding spree, in a few days i think.

yes

this wasn't like you, well kinda but not really..

dug that 'wet corpse of a sketch'

still need a collab

she was a lover of many, friend and daughter of few
rosebud modeling moves, cheekbones blossoming blooms
breathing white november winds. dark skin softer than june
i'm a junky in a suit. space-age saucer recluse
nose-deep in ketamine and metropolitan news

this is why u need to write songs to beats. imagine this shit transferred into a verse.
why are you afraid? bro your so afraid.. just do it, c'mon its been long enough...
sometime you gotta embrace the things you hate most

From "i've got nothing left to lose. only coffins to use" til the last line was what appealed to me most. I don't read you much, but I like how deliberate your switches in thought are. It comes off as freestyle-ish, but its not quite a train of thought piece. It feels more thoughtful and premeditated, yet not try-hard. I saw glimpses of what i assume is your life and i really like how these tidbits are sprinkled throughout.

I try to downplay hype tbh, but i think i'll read you more.

One of the best you've dropped. The subject matter was the shtuff I liked. Forlorn but aggressive. The section DexLabb quoted, 'preference' line, drink/reproduce/love/divorce, and the last four or so lines were the highlights. Good read here.

aggressive conqueror. benign tumor, pre-operative room
post doctorate, your honor with tautological blues
modus operandi, let the drama resume
i've got nothing left to lose. only coffins to use

Ridiculous.

its crazy how you blend everything together man, true genius penmanship at work and I mean that. keep dropping ill be reading.

RTF: http://netcees.co/showthread.php?t=63323