I'll let you know what potential anime dangers you face, based on where you are
 

go!

Hah! Lowell/ Boston

Tentacle monster invasion imminent.

Protect your butthole at all costs.

In suspended animation on my way to post apocalyptic new York underwater space colony.

yes sir

Lmao

Philly area

I'm on Elenin.

NZ. Lets go.

Sounds like a pretty typical anime day to me. You should be fine.

I'm sorry to tell you, but Elenin isn't actually an asteroid or dwarf star or comet, or whatever it was.

It's actually an abandoned space colony, that's going to be dropped on earth, as a part of Operation Meteor. After the colony hits, 5 gundams are going to be sent to Earth Sphere in order to take over what's left of it.

And as always, beware of tentacle monsters - guard your cornhole

See above. Bad news is the colony is going to fall right on to your city.

And of course, the tentacle monsters - protect'em your rectum.

You didn't give me a location.. but, one can never be too safe when protecting themselves from tentacle monsters, lurking, waiting, attempting to poke you in the backslot.

haha... what's that skit, where they're like "okay, by signing this contract you agree not to fall in love with the octopus"

"okay you can have sex with the octopus ONE time"

i think it was Whitest Kids You Know

I lost my shit after reeds first danger

SYDNEY, AUS

What in the Effffff

Lmaoooooooo

PA

I've never liked anime, don't see what's so great about it.