dead like me
 

Yeah, this melon is Godly. That intellectual stimuli I felt was enthralling. Mapping out existence. Placing myself next to Hawking. I couldn't tell it was prob'ly not the healthiest hobby 'til I was rejecting life with every cell in my body. I've gotten so smart I appear to be dumb. I mean seriously, who wants to see life as a stream of zeroes and ones? Words become meaningless. Meaning becomes even less. Everything I see is a dream that I'm sleeping in. Used to be so naive. So much different than this. Oh how I miss that ignorant bliss. I've become faceless. I'm nothing. Too far removed to even relate to the public. Can't even say where I'm coming... from. Holding a razor up under guns I've placed on my fucking tongue. It's crazy. I've come undone. Just waiting for what's become of every fate since the sun begun. Sociopath holding Romeo's flask. Making the buzzards lunch. On the cusp of 30. So much worry. So much hurting. Seems a lot easier to just cut out early. Pack it up, I'm giving in. Get off the pot and let the living live. Zombie existence. Posthumous living. Anonymous. Just wandering. Bothered by senses. Structures collapsing. Never relaxing. Severed the past when dad took his medicine nap and elected a casket. Gray gloss the rainbows. I'm Morgan Freeman without Andy, or Zihuatanejo. Inner child frightened. Wouldn't come near us. Can't look in the mirror. Hell; I can taste it. Aimless. No humor in my self deprecation.

^^ really liked that for some reason lol. This is dope dude. Lots of quality written surfacing lately. Rhyming was nuts. Content was a little too emo for me but the mechanics definitely made this a great read.

It was actually the perfect amount of emo, for me.

u know what, i'm completely wrong about this piece. upon re-read, thanks to cakecakecake's comment, i've come to realize its not about emo but ego (psychologically speakin, of course). i was able to see another layer it certainly deserves a re-evaluation.

The movie A Beautiful Mind comes to mind as i was reading this a second time. For those who haven't seen that movie, it's about a math genius who suffers from some kind of psychological problem; As a result he starts seeing people and is even influenced by these figments. The similarity isn't in the plot but the underlying theme. Knowledge isn't always power. In the film's case, his overactive mind combined with psychological issue posed a problem. In this piece, the level of intelligence of the character created a sort of apathy and he can't seem to distinguish or shed the constant thinking. That point was best described by this part..

Both character had issues with "chattering mind". One was manifested into different peronality the other just cant stop it from happening.

I think one past deep-root problem was touched on, vaguely in this piece..
but ultimately the point here is...is knowing everything all it's cracked up to be or a catalyst for a breakdown? I dug the allusion to the literary figures of the past:

Poe alluded to a greater being in his quote while Void simply imagined what if I am that greater being; God. Omniscience.

I regret calling this emo the first time around lol, but this was a very well thought out piece. Ignorant is bliss. And God is lonely.

take that take that

This was ill to me.

Props on the piece mane.. I gave it a couple reads actually.

Awesome. This was like sucking on Kate upton's clitty like a broken in milkshake. Awesome.

this was very deep and I enjoyed the fuck out of this.

Can't look in the mirror. Hell; I can taste it. Aimless. No humor in my self deprecation.

that was just a cold as line and exactly how I feel at times

SO fuckin sick, flow was legit

upping. I will actually give this real feed shortly.

*Clears bladder*

Gimme a minute sheesh..

*clears throat*

I am not sure I understand it?
geeze its so deep how could I...
dam man will you be my friend?
I think your my new hero seriously

Sarcasm about simple writing being deep. I'm not sure what to do.

I liked it but I didn't like it. The beginning came off as a more self entitled prose, and the guts of it was explaining the process of your braggy art in the beginning, which was great. The Morgan Freeman line was very good, and probably the only real stand out line, content wise. Wording is there, as usual. This melon is godly isn't a totally absolutely mind blowing sentiment, but the wording made it so. And when I start to read this, the first few words, I already know the entire sentence because you have a certain replay value that doesn't lose it's effect, as where others - unfortunately do (other writers). And that's what inherently separates you by a wide margin.

"I've gotten so smart I appear to be dumb. I mean seriously, who wants to see life as a stream of zeroes and ones? Words become meaningless. Meaning becomes even less. Everything I see is a dream that I'm sleeping in. Used to be so naive. So much different than this. Oh how I miss that ignorant bliss. I've become faceless. I'm nothing."

This was strictly you. exhibiting a totality of self preservation, so uniquely monotonous yet mind numbingly humdrum. The way you categorize a moulded anacrusis. As previously stated. The zeroes and ones is so supremely put together in an encasing of wording so unjust. It affixes that much more merit to a superficial hunch in your rhyme galaxies nanoscale.


I like your platosophy. lol. "I know that i know nothing"

It's such a realistic introspective musing that could go on for eons.

"I'm nothing. Too far removed to even relate to the public. Can't even say where I'm coming... from. Holding a razor up under guns I've placed on my fucking tongue. It's crazy. I've come undone. Just waiting for what's become of every fate since the sun begun."

It's funny how simple this is, which is why I didn't find it that dope, I mean of course it's a star-studded basis. I think after a few readings and the improvement of both our ends this reads as just another piece that is fun to go back to read on. Of course saying that sounds completely douchebaggish, but; fortunately and unfortunately it holds much truth.

The perplexing and demented part about it, is that your ending was much more what I was looking for and that area of writing is a bit more appreciated by a more experienced and, ironically the bourgeois of comformity. You told me I need to find a new hobby. I resent that snobby comment and raise you this commentary. Now apologize.

Jack? me? off the top of my head I don't recall sarcasm this guy is dope.

uppin