Xanax.
 

Ever lived the life of some everyday struggle shit
wake up in the morning cold as shit pull up them covers quick

parts of the house blocked off to keep the heat confined..
..& in my mind my walls are fortified to protect my tortured mind.

Dad ain't workin in over a year, i'm consumed with the fear
as the feeling grows it goes to show my dads an addict
i cant have it gotta break the habit makes me want to shed a tear

wake up in the middle of the night with hunger pains
the thunder bangs and you don't know when you'll eat again
but in the world of sin i realized the show don't stop the world spins
my whirlwind of a life.. some things don't seem right so im awake at night comtemplating taking my own life.

Meth.. "ice"... it comsumes his life
can't get out of bed without hittin the pipe
its pathetic really, rather kinda silly
livin like hillbillys in this tortured city

just cause i'm not on the block servin rocks
doesnt mean that the struggle stops




i know this shit stupid lol but i just had to write something.. feed is appreciated but not expected.

Emotion was straight, I liked how you bought the scheme back at times yet the multies while doin' so either read as forced or were non existent.Your word choices are awkward, try writin' sumthin' how you would actually say it irl...this isn't great by a long shot but it's far from bad, imo anyways.

Stay upwards.

I was feeling it. Flow could have been smoother in some areas but this seemed like it was on some real shit. The emotion was present throughout. some lines really seemed to have trust and substance. Just work on that flow a bit. nice drop

a bit rough around the edges bro but how can you criticize something so personal and deep? I love the emotion that you are willing to write with.. can make for a gem if you put in the legwork..

It isn't stupid, it just isn't great. It's lacking a bit here and there. But seeing how this is a personal text made for venting I can definitely respect what you're doing. If it wasn't for the fact that writing eased my mind I probably wouldn't have started doing it myself in the first place. Keep writing and stick to improving yourself. Peace.

I liked this at least you talking about something worth talking about! Not hating on everyone else like some spoil little dick heads on here. Keep writing! It may not have been your best work but you can tell you have real potential.