Netcees - RPK (3-1) vs. Flo Real (2-1) RPK WINS

Netcees (http://netcees.org/index.php)

- Battle Arena Archives (http://netcees.org/forumdisplay.php?f=10)

- - RPK (3-1) vs. Flo Real (2-1) RPK WINS (http://netcees.org/showthread.php?t=4129)

RPK (3-1) vs. Flo Real (2-1) RPK WINS

10 lines, 24 hrs, house rules

Check

My concepts being used on you such a waste fam*
Your a larger waste of space then your sig of the Mojave waste land
way you were frontin for this fight I thought, yo who is this dude?
But your a nobody! which is why only 3 people have ever mentioned you
He loves playing games - just look at his obsession with fall out
I play wit ya ho an if I do well it's da first letter in ya name she calls out*
Yo I'm firing on all cylinders son*facing me what you expect bitch,
He's on a *suicide mission shootin himself like his Facebook pics *
I'll tie a chain around your neck an strangle you to death
You'll choke! An not cus I'm leavin you*struggling to catch your breath*

u don't stand a chance with me,I'm fit to teach u a lesson
I'm ensured to kill u first in a battle,Flo...u should know I'm Progressive
This fag has no aggression,u won't see this dude murk me
How could he get angry...Rayge wouldn't even show in the Noob Tourney
I'm known for murders,victims get lost in the goryness
I'll leave u deaded when I Run the Blade...call me Oscar Pistorius
Getting tutored isn't helping,nothing u learned can prepare ya
Its ironic ur tutored by Nik...and u got concepts from his era
U ain't got no dope plays,plus i think ur flow's gay
I don't even need a punchline for this...bitch,u lost to Obey

This is ridiculous - upping for some votes you lazy shits

My concepts being used on you such a waste fam*
Your a larger waste of space then your sig of the Mojave waste land
OK. Sig/avvy flips usually need a really harsh punch or really dope wp to be good. This was aight..
way you were frontin for this fight I thought, yo who is this dude?
But your a nobody! which is why only 3 people have ever mentioned you
cool. Bit obv
He loves playing games - just look at his obsession with fall out
I play wit ya ho an if I do well it's da first letter in ya name she calls out*
"R"? OK
Yo I'm firing on all cylinders son*facing me what you expect bitch,
He's on a *suicide mission shootin himself like his Facebook pics *
what fb pics?
I'll tie a chain around your neck an strangle you to death
You'll choke! An not cus I'm leavin you*struggling to catch your breath*
almost..

not bad dude... keep writing, you'll get better. Try to rhyme more than one syllable, in a text verse it makes it flow better for the person reading it and gives it more swag... and that can make punches come off harder

u don't stand a chance with me,I'm fit to teach u a lesson
I'm ensured to kill u first in a battle,Flo...u should know I'm Progressive
didn't get it, did a quick google... something about pokemon? I'll just assume a connection between flo & progressive... which makes it an OK nameflip but would been better if you coulda worked 'progressive' into a diss against him instead of a self hype type of thing
This fag has no aggression,u won't see this dude murk me
How could he get angry...Rayge wouldn't even show in the Noob Tourney
cool personal. set up well for the wp... maybe a reference to 'ppl dont consider u worth showing for' or something to aid the punch
I'm known for murders,victims get lost in the goryness
I'll leave u deaded when I Run the Blade...call me Oscar Pistorius
good swag but not a hard hitting line
Getting tutored isn't helping,nothing u learned can prepare ya
Its ironic ur tutored by Nik...and u got concepts from his era
heh, cool
U ain't got no dope plays,plus i think ur flow's gay
I don't even need a punchline for this...bitch,u lost to Obey
yeah, not bad

good swag throughout. Couple cool lines in there. Keep writing.

I actually came to this thread bc I've seen Flo posting in discussion and he seems like quite an amiable young chap so I wanted to vote for him but after the breakdown I'm forced to conclude that RPK got it

v/ RPK

Quote:

Originally Posted by Flo Real (Post 19980)

Check

My concepts being used on you such a waste fam*
Your a larger waste of space then your sig of the Mojave waste land
generally want to stay away from sig/avvy flips. They've got to be insanely on to hit, this didnt really do much damage
way you were frontin for this fight I thought, yo who is this dude?
But your a nobody! which is why only 3 people have ever mentioned you
A little statementy. I feel like a mention flip has to be done hard to hit, but the whole nobody concept was good ammo for the battle
He loves playing games - just look at his obsession with fall out
I play wit ya ho an if I do well it's da first letter in ya name she calls out*
R? Are? Arrrrr? I think I used something like that on Ohgee back on NC... The idea's kinda basic, but I'm a fan of it if its done really well. This one kinda confused me
Yo I'm firing on all cylinders son*facing me what you expect bitch,
He's on a *suicide mission shootin himself like his Facebook pics *
I actually thought shooting himself like his facebook pics was a pretty nice idea, could've done with being expnaded on to try to add more of a flip of an idiom like shooting himself in the foot or something... idk. Good idea, coulda benefited from being worked
I'll tie a chain around your neck an strangle you to death
You'll choke! An not cus I'm leavin you*struggling to catch your breath*
feel like this is a little played... but its a good early wp attempt

I know this is old but you do show promise here, you already improved quite a bit as far as wording goes and conceptually you're much farther ahead now. Keep at it.

Quote:

Originally Posted by RPK (Post 20218)

u don't stand a chance with me,I'm fit to teach u a lesson
I'm ensured to kill u first in a battle,Flo...u should know I'm Progressive
I liked the concept a lot, but the excecution didnt hit as hard as it couldve
This fag has no aggression,u won't see this dude murk me
How could he get angry...Rayge wouldn't even show in the Noob Tourney
Pretty nice, but missing a really solid punch part
I'm known for murders,victims get lost in the goryness
I'll leave u deaded when I Run the Blade...call me Oscar Pistorius
ANother punch where it ends being about you, and they can be nice, but most of the time I feel like bars are more effective when they're focused on the hit rather than making one's self appear better
Getting tutored isn't helping,nothing u learned can prepare ya
Its ironic ur tutored by Nik...and u got concepts from his era
Basic but alright. Probably could've been worded a little harder, I'm a fan of 'ironic you ____ because ____' but i guess its preference
U ain't got no dope plays,plus i think ur flow's gay
I don't even need a punchline for this...bitch,u lost to Obey
'no punchline' lines are usually kinda bland, was still some kinda hit. usually I see them as more of a concept that you just decided to state, so its rarely as effective as it could be

You've got concepts and wording, make them connect and you're golden

Nice battle guys, feel like RPK took it comfortably tho

V/ RPK

Cheers for the feedback in your vote @sharp I have to say your feedback on my last two battles you voted on been much help. Nice one

2-0 uppin

None

VS

Getting tutored isn't helping,nothing u learned can prepare ya
Its ironic ur tutored by Nik...and u got concepts from his era
This fag has no aggression,u won't see this dude murk me
How could he get angry...Rayge wouldn't even show in the Noob Tourney

Vote=RPK

nada

vs.

tutored, I guess the noob tourney.

Weak battle, but RPK clearly took it.

Flo, you didn't really attack your opponent.

V.RPK

Quote:

Originally Posted by RPK (Post 20218)

u don't stand a chance with me,I'm fit to teach u a lesson
I'm ensured to kill u first in a battle,Flo...u should know I'm Progressive
> concept was backwards but nice creativity
This fag has no aggression,u won't see this dude murk me
How could he get angry...Rayge wouldn't even show in the Noob Tourney
> definitely not.
I'm known for murders,victims get lost in the goryness
I'll leave u deaded when I Run the Blade...call me Oscar Pistorius
>ok
Getting tutored isn't helping,nothing u learned can prepare ya
Its ironic ur tutored by Nik...and u got concepts from his era
>that's not ironic at all but ok personal
U ain't got no dope plays,plus i think ur flow's gay
I don't even need a punchline for this...bitch,u lost to Obey
>when will these lines go extinct

Quote:

Originally Posted by Flo Real (Post 19980)

Check

My concepts being used on you such a waste fam*
Your a larger waste of space then your sig of the Mojave waste land
>sig flips are lame but okay
way you were frontin for this fight I thought, yo who is this dude?
But your a nobody! which is why only 3 people have ever mentioned you
>dumb
He loves playing games - just look at his obsession with fall out
I play wit ya ho an if I do well it's da first letter in ya name she calls out*
>wat
Yo I'm firing on all cylinders son*facing me what you expect bitch,
He's on a *suicide mission shootin himself like his Facebook pics *
>stupid
I'll tie a chain around your neck an strangle you to death
You'll choke! An not cus I'm leavin you*struggling to catch your breath*
>not bad but simple concept

Both had about two hits... both had bad misses. RPK's flips were more played than anything and Flo's were nice attempts but weren't hard hitting. I have RPK winning this, because RPK's angles were laughably old but they definitely connected better.