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-   -   Mystical (http://netcees.org/showthread.php?t=158273)

Etherwave 07-10-2024 02:31 AM

Mystical
 
You're a kind of like a mystic.
With God like visage.
I been a witness to your alchemy, it's vintage.
I got perfect vision...
But maybe youre a wizard, just effecting physics.
But can you really listen,
Am I just an echo in the distance?
Pharaoh! Pharaoh?
Will this spell diminish,
Or is it altruistic.....what isn't given?
I can't tell the difference, it's feeling sacrilegious, a new religion.
Or am I just a bigot?

Objective 07-12-2024 11:16 PM

Short and sweet lil piece of questioning the bigger things in life, or perhaps it's a metamorphosis of self? Whether it's for better or worse seems to be for the future to figure out. This piece also reads a bit like finding a new love interest or a new best friend but you're not quite sure whether or not they'll be good for you.

Either way, the opening line wasn't that clear to me:
"You're a kind of like a mystic. "
^A kind of a mystic, or like a kind of mystic?

Besides of that hiccup I enjoyed the read and the stream of thoughts/questions you put me through through the eyes of your protagonist.

Etherwave 07-13-2024 01:44 AM

Typo haha. I thought I edited it. Thanks for reminding me. And I appreciate the feedback!


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