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WEEK 9: Destroyer 5-3 VS Username 4-3 USER WINS
Welcome to the NBL
Rules Line limit Minimum: 10 Maximum: 16 Verses due 11:59pm EST December 4, 2020 (Friday) Extensions are granted automatically. 24-hour max. MUST BE REQUESTED BY DEADLINE Good luck, gentlemen |
https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachmen...352/image3.jpg
text prowess, calorie intake, even his foot size won this guy dwarfs me in every category but mostly cuz he literally looks like one we need to get u help bro. forget about bars. this shit’s drastic when ur friends tell u to ‘kick the hobbit’ it ain’t cuz they got British accents and the ones who stay silent have done bro a disgrace like some kind of dyslexic aero... he’s taken a bilbo to the face... gunbars won’t work on u. need eye of newt and a battle-honed axe i dont want to smoke u, i want to whittle a pipe that looks like u and just smoke that go in on days off to shell out cells to switch from a home phone u get called into work??? it’s cuz some kid just wished on a snow globe my home you’ll find lego-less cuz i cant stand stepping on the shit in bare feet in ur home u find Legolas, because u two fought side by side at Helm’s Deep. des got a wife, true, but keeps a mistress and a girl for weekend cheating user stays with three hos too, but only cuz it’s how he gives season’s greetings |
https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachmen...219/image3.jpg
Bro, your head’s getting clowned for it’s shape That thing looks like the spoon Finny’s been cooking on since 2008 You old fuck, I've got something biblical on the docket First I'll dead you, then eat EVERY Werther's Original in your pocket Senile ass, but if we’re honest, I will murder this elf If I told you to act your age, this picture would be an urn on a shelf Des hates his own race, and he’s been whining for years Can’t even go grey in peace, he thinks whites are gentrifying his beard Orbital is JACKED, the one to the right of his snout's worse That I's been at the center of a punch more than any in Scout's verse But one move or a squirm and I am shooting this worm Lookin’ like Mr. Clean, dead for 30 years after losing to germs Someone sent me this pic, but really went the drastic route Cuz Des’ been dead for years, his girl just photoshops the casket out |
Vote - Des
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Des
text prowess, calorie intake, even his foot size won this guy dwarfs me in every category but mostly cuz he literally looks like one my home you’ll find lego-less cuz i cant stand stepping on the shit in bare feet in ur home u find Legolas, because u two fought side by side at Helm’s Deep. User Bro, your head’s getting clowned for it’s shape That thing looks like the spoon Finny’s been cooking on since 2008 Orbital is JACKED, the one to the right of his snout's worse That I's been at the center of a punch more than any in Scout's verse Got it dead even in standouts, quality and quantity Comes down to nonstandouts. I think des had the bigger misses like kick the hobbit & his closer User had more almosts like werthers & act your age This is close but Voting User |
Des I thought this was one of your weaker efforts tbh.you stuck to the dwarf disses throughout but a few just seemed too forced to work.. kick the hobbit? Lol opener I liked and legoless somehow went from a wtf to dope.
User opener was fire and s perfect wording throughout carried it off. Werthers original was funny. I didn’t even know they were a thing in America. Gentrifying also nice Vote - user |
Quote:
Close: whittle a pipe, snow globe Nice verse. Didn't like bilbo but the rest were all nice concepts. Your wording was on point for most of the verse. Some of the LoTR references felt overboard after a while but you were working with the pic you had. Enjoyed the read, keep it up man. Quote:
Close: Mr. Clean, casket You focus on humor in your bars, which can be hit or miss I guess depending on the reader. You aren't really using a lot of word play or flips, most of your punches are observational, so if the humor doesn't carry it, some lines fall flat. That said, you're probably the funniest writer on the site, so it doesn't usually matter, you make it work. Vote: Destroyer Battle is exactly even on quotes/mentions so tie break is basically just who's verse I'm feeling more. I'm usually not a huge destro fan b/c of his wording but that wasn't an issue this week. Verse focused mostly on the dwarf/santa angle so it loses a little on creativity to users. I also usually like UserName's style, his wording is always smooth and he's funny as fuck. But some of the concepts were a little on the simpler side this week. It felt like User fell off more in the second half of his verse, so I'm giving Des a slight edge for consistency. Good battle on both sides tho. |
text prowess, calorie intake, even his foot size won
this guy dwarfs me in every category but mostly cuz he literally looks like one my home you’ll find lego-less cuz i cant stand stepping on the shit in bare feet in ur home u find Legolas, because u two fought side by side at Helm’s Deep. Vs Senile ass, but if we’re honest, I will murder this elf If I told you to act your age, this picture would be an urn on a shelf Des hates his own race, and he’s been whining for years Can’t even go grey in peace, he thinks whites are gentrifying his beard Orbital is JACKED, the one to the right of his snout's worse That I's been at the center of a punch more than any in Scout's verse Someone sent me this pic, but really went the drastic route Cuz Des’ been dead for years, his girl just photoshops the casket out V/user in a close one. The dwarf angle was cool but got repetitive quick |
Need more votes
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text prowess, calorie intake, even his foot size won
this guy dwarfs me in every category but mostly cuz he literally looks like one cool we need to get u help bro. forget about bars. this shit’s drastic when ur friends tell u to ‘kick the hobbit’ it ain’t cuz they got British accents lol and the ones who stay silent have done bro a disgrace like some kind of dyslexic aero... he’s taken a bilbo to the face... ehh mild gunbars won’t work on u. need eye of newt and a battle-honed axe i dont want to smoke u, i want to whittle a pipe that looks like u and just smoke that lol go in on days off to shell out cells to switch from a home phone u get called into work??? it’s cuz some kid just wished on a snow globe ok cool execution my home you’ll find lego-less cuz i cant stand stepping on the shit in bare feet in ur home u find Legolas, because u two fought side by side at Helm’s Deep. wow des got a wife, true, but keeps a mistress and a girl for weekend cheating user stays with three hos too, but only cuz it’s how he gives season’s greetings okk vs. Bro, your head’s getting clowned for it’s shape That thing looks like the spoon Finny’s been cooking on since 2008 dead lmao You old fuck, I've got something biblical on the docket First I'll dead you, then eat EVERY Werther's Original in your pocket okk Senile ass, but if we’re honest, I will murder this elf If I told you to act your age, this picture would be an urn on a shelf decent Des hates his own race, and he’s been whining for years Can’t even go grey in peace, he thinks whites are gentrifying his beard lol Orbital is JACKED, the one to the right of his snout's worse That I's been at the center of a punch more than any in Scout's verse ehh But one move or a squirm and I am shooting this worm Lookin’ like Mr. Clean, dead for 30 years after losing to germs ok Someone sent me this pic, but really went the drastic route Cuz Des’ been dead for years, his girl just photoshops the casket out ok I like this better than the urn on a sheelf nice battle.. clash of styles. Finny is LOTB but I got destroyer here by a pinch.. matter of style preference v/des |
text prowess, calorie intake, even his foot size won
this guy dwarfs me in every category but mostly cuz he literally looks like one Lol, he does. ok we need to get u help bro. forget about bars. this shit’s drastic when ur friends tell u to ‘kick the hobbit’ it ain’t cuz they got British accents This doesn’t work and the ones who stay silent have done bro a disgrace like some kind of dyslexic aero... he’s taken a bilbo to the face... LOL it gets a pass because it’s hilarious gunbars won’t work on u. need eye of newt and a battle-honed axe i dont want to smoke u, i want to whittle a pipe that looks like u and just smoke that Not feeling go in on days off to shell out cells to switch from a home phone u get called into work??? it’s cuz some kid just wished on a snow globe Cool my home you’ll find lego-less cuz i cant stand stepping on the shit in bare feet in ur home u find Legolas, because u two fought side by side at Helm’s Deep. Too forced for me man but appreciate the idea des got a wife, true, but keeps a mistress and a girl for weekend cheating user stays with three hos too, but only cuz it’s how he gives season’s greetings Ok lol Vs Bro, your head’s getting clowned for it’s shape That thing looks like the spoon Finny’s been cooking on since 2008 Lol ok You old fuck, I've got something biblical on the docket First I'll dead you, then eat EVERY Werther's Original in your pocket I see this getting some hype but I’m like nah.. it’s just a bit simple Senile ass, but if we’re honest, I will murder this elf If I told you to act your age, this picture would be an urn on a shelf Nice one Des hates his own race, and he’s been whining for years Can’t even go grey in peace, he thinks whites are gentrifying his beard Not really feeling Orbital is JACKED, the one to the right of his snout's worse That I's been at the center of a punch more than any in Scout's verse Ok ok But one move or a squirm and I am shooting this worm Lookin’ like Mr. Clean, dead for 30 years after losing to germs The fuck is mr clean? Someone sent me this pic, but really went the drastic route Cuz Des’ been dead for years, his girl just photoshops the casket out Ehhh nah I’m voting Des in a close one |
text prowess, calorie intake, even his foot size won
this guy dwarfs me in every category but mostly cuz he literally looks like one go in on days off to shell out cells to switch from a home phone u get called into work??? it’s cuz some kid just wished on a snow globe I'm not a big fan of complimenting someone as part of a bar but you basically said he was better than you at text...so it lost a little thunder to me. Could have done more with the dwarf thing and the santa stuff was weak too because he doesnt really look like it. vs. Bro, your head’s getting clowned for it’s shape That thing looks like the spoon Finny’s been cooking on since 2008 You old fuck, I've got something biblical on the docket First I'll dead you, then eat EVERY Werther's Original in your pocket Orbital is JACKED, the one to the right of his snout's worse That I's been at the center of a punch more than any in Scout's verse But one move or a squirm and I am shooting this worm Lookin’ like Mr. Clean, dead for 30 years after losing to germs What I liked about this was that a lot of it felt fresh and basically a different idea every bar. Some bad misses, but even they were attempts at doing something else. V/ User |
text prowess, calorie intake, even his foot size won
this guy dwarfs me in every category but mostly cuz he literally looks like one Lol at the gimli reference.. chuckle worthy but saying he dwarfs you in text prowess isn't a good look for the impact of the punch we need to get u help bro. forget about bars. this shit’s drastic when ur friends tell u to ‘kick the hobbit’ it ain’t cuz they got British accents Maybe it works maybe it doesn't... seems like a reach but okay and the ones who stay silent have done bro a disgrace like some kind of dyslexic aero... he’s taken a bilbo to the face... This one/concept for sure doesn't work gunbars won’t work on u. need eye of newt and a battle-honed axe i dont want to smoke u, i want to whittle a pipe that looks like u and just smoke that Wording not the smoothest , this was okay go in on days off to shell out cells to switch from a home phone u get called into work??? it’s cuz some kid just wished on a snow globe Lol this was funny to me my home you’ll find lego-less cuz i cant stand stepping on the shit in bare feet in ur home u find Legolas, because u two fought side by side at Helm’s Deep. Lego-less and leg a lass doesn't work....I'll over look it tho bcuz the punch doesn't even need the setup word association to be funny des got a wife, true, but keeps a mistress and a girl for weekend cheating user stays with three hos too, but only cuz it’s how he gives season’s greetings This is a good example of a long-winded setup that doesn't need to be... "des got a wife, but keeps a side piece for weekend cheating " would be a lot cleaner imo... Santa hos / hoes jokes have been done a hundred times so even with the pic reference this is just okay to me Vs Bro, your head’s getting clowned for it’s shape That thing looks like the spoon Finny’s been cooking on since 2008 Lmao funny site & pic reference .. this was jokes to me You old fuck, I've got something biblical on the docket First I'll dead you, then eat EVERY Werther's Original in your pocket Lol funny old man swag I haven't seen before...not a bagger but the wording makes this enjoyable to me Senile ass, but if we’re honest, I will murder this elf If I told you to act your age, this picture would be an urn on a shelf Cool concept...solid Des hates his own race, and he’s been whining for years Can’t even go grey in peace, he thinks whites are gentrifying his beard Lol appreciate the concept... cool idea , solid jab Orbital is JACKED, the one to the right of his snout's worse That I's been at the center of a punch more than any in Scout's verse Okay cool site reference again.. Dece But one move or a squirm and I am shooting this worm Lookin’ like Mr. Clean, dead for 30 years after losing to germs Lmao...wording was butter...dead at someone saying who is Mr Clean Someone sent me this pic, but really went the drastic route Cuz Des’ been dead for years, his girl just photoshops the casket out Lol I think this is a cool use of the pic...I can see it Cool battle....both gave come better in previous weeks... Des a couple of the LOTR ideas I quite liked, others I didn't... User had a bit more variety and I think was more consistent...his much better wording made his punches land a lil stronger imo as well Props to both User won this to me |
Votes close at 9. And the leader wins.
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