Onslaught
 

still sick with it on a wicked quick visit
got slick wits to kick shit and rip vicious
on frigid bitches unlike heat my bars emit
that fierce fire from an arsonist narcissist
the flame burn MCs until straight surgery
no fake curtesy I need to break curfew see
in a state of emergency the scene is declining
that seems to be whining please dont remind me
I fill empty halls like a scene from The Shining

free styling rhyming and reviving forums
tiring poems have peeps dying of boredom
trying be awesome to belong in the kingdom
new recruits giving veterans PTSD syndrome
them foes getting banned is a righteous act
now trifling acts contemplate fighting back
returning with double accounts twice as wack
thats misery, trickery and bickering all moody
but if Im brooding I find it rather soothing
to just punch somebody, call it a mood swing

several blows permanently damaging temporal lobes
shining like emerald glow on you basement dwellers
blatant failures being misled by red herrings
think the board is slow - check your bearings
or try nuance, fix your glasses, get new ones
people flexing on my text equals sub-humans
selfish crooks aiming to maintain a well kept look
catch em at the bookstore reading self-help books
stuck from the start, chumps who get robbed in the park
put the glock to my heart only make a shot in the dark

dunno why these cats thinking they some rap kingpins
getting pissed on by everybody, time to let facts sink in
if we battled, they'd be too traumatized to remember it
crack their craniums and give em fractured memories
im the type to unleash mortars on any mortal scum
you're basically a straw person packing a water gun
leave em slaughtered and gone, all bastards decayed
have kids passing away so I can be dancing on graves

Strong brag verse man. You had compounds in your compounds and a flow that never fell off despite the length. Are you a Big L fan? You should check him out if not. Your use of vocab was good, sometimes you don't see that in a brag piece. Nice use of imagery in a couple of lines, which usually reserved for topicals. You got a good skill set. Nice work.

Keep on keeping on. Thanks for the reply.

-6

you know i really enjoy these verses. its not too caught up on high power concepts, just a straight up exercise on rhyme and flow with some cool swag thrown in for measure. this particular segment was interesting to me, rhyme scheme-wise

not sure how to explain but its such a unique rhyme scheme. it was multi, multi then transition into another rhyme -2nd- line which then transitioned into another rhyme -3rd line- then callback to original multi with 'the board is slow' lulz. i don't think i've ever seen that type of scheme. it shouldnt work but somehow it does. really cool my man.

i used to write like this when i was 18. not that i back then, or this, was bad. but yea, nostalgia is weird.

Thanks. I was looking for a polite way to say that this piece is banal or trite.

I heard a couple of albums of him back in the day and as far as I remember he had some cool songs, plan to check more from him and ditch crew eventually. I
know him and Finesse are pioners within their style.
Anyways thanks to all for commenting, see if I can return the favor later.

should have just drawn a self-comparison!