Attention Netcitizens
 

The NCPD has issued a warrant for the detention and questioning of one Frankie Corleone. Mr. Corleone, thought to be related to an associate of Brooklawn criminal "Lumpy Johnston", is wanted for questioning on the following charges:

• Impersonating a Member of the Wu-Tang Clan: The accused is alleged to have violated Allentown, PA's strict law against claims of false membership in 90's hip-hop acts, punishable by up to 10 years in federal prison.
• Transportation of a minor across states of reality: The accused is alleged to have transported his 6 year old self into an alternate reality where he, at 6 years of age, was a member of the Wu-Tang Clan. As the victim is a child, this allegation is taken very seriously.
• Possession of Illegal Crip GPS IP trackers: The accused is equipped with top of the line technology, capable of discerning anyone's continent using only their IP address.
• Multiple Violations of Prop 17: Goes without saying.

Anyone with information is urged to contact the NCPD immediately. A reward of a fictional platinum gospel rap album is being offered for any tips that lead to an arrest.

Stay safe.

lol.. funny, im starting to feel like "Michael Douglas" in the film, "the game".. lmfao

DEAD

@Lumpy Johnston to thread

My guy I literally laughed out loud

Possibly a full chortle

Will you be seeking your own council or shall the court appoint you an attorney?

90% sure I've seen the perp selling nickelbags of mids on the roughest corner of allentown

what a tragedy :(

https://i.ibb.co/YdPmjfV/Screenshot-...8-22-45-52.png

@judge chester charlesworth

Send the Pi Coin to my wallet, my associates and I are ready for your orders.

Example of prop 17:

The accused has stated he’s got goons in Miami.

Your honor, this is an absolute lie.

Execute Order 82.

Lmao

Yo I'm Corleone's attorney, he just hired me with his proceeds from his AOL keystyle cyphers. I represent my client ... to the fullest.

Judge: Okay...

We are prepared for opening breath mints

Judge: Breath...? You mean opening statements?

Yes. I feel for my client about the lack of respect dogg... I mean judge. I can vouch that he also turned down 1 mill in 1999 to ghostwrite for Biggie and Pac but they was dead and my client has his morals. Plus, when Universal came knocking at his do' he told em you either sling crack rock or got a wicked jumpshot, then Biggie went back in time and bit that as well.

Prosecution: Objection...

On what grounds?

Prosecution: Um... time travel?

Judge: Sustained.

Whatever. I mean lmmmaaoooooo at these herbs for doubting him.

Judge: Why are you laughing?

I swear if they knew MC McFizzle back in the day he'd clear my clients rep. Ask Boogie and Lil Sneezy they know he was about to blow, plus, I mean he came to the netcees site in 1981 and champed every league y'alls had. Dont act like he cant put contract out on y'alls ass like money in the bank...

Prosecution: Objection. Your honor...

Judge: I'm going to put a stop to this...

Which, by the way, vinny mac from wwe offered him 2 mil for that concept. Y'alls just clowns lmmaaoooooo. Now vote for tha realest netcee Corleone in the Sharp battle or yall can eat a dick. He's turned down about 10 mil and now lives in his moms attic hoarding AOL keystyle cyphers between himself and Brilliance and Starburst from Fabolous.com which are available to purchase on his site, cuz he's a real artist. Yall can get fuckkedddd. Me and his pet spider on the window sill knows Whatsupp. peace and love my brother. Fuck these haters. I rest my case.

Judge: You... rest your case?

I mean, no... We plead the fifth, your honor.

Prosecution: Objection!

Judge: Oh for fuck sakes.

Fucking dead lmao

lol.. cool roast..

on blood jit

https://i.ibb.co/NtqKgLR/Screenshot-...8-23-54-21.png

Is that Sharps house?

Damn this dude does have shooters

Prosecution: Your honor I'd like to request this case be dismissed.

Wait. You know my client was a member of the Wu Tang Clan, right?

Judge: Oh boy. Which member?

He was a fan.

Judge: Being a fan doesn't make him a member.

Objection! Speculation.

Judge: Did you just object me?

I'd like to request an immediate Article 41 and move to strike.

Judge: I dont understand, you're striking your own testimony from the record? And theres no such thing as an Article 41.

... yet

Prosecution: Your honor, what are we doing here?

We're invoking my clients right to a speedy trial.

Judge: That's not what we're doing here.

I'd like my client to take the stand.

Corleone: Yo call me a Stan again motherfucker I'll show up to ya crib and ass fuck ya fams in front of ya and wear ya flesh as a turban you wop dyke prick faggot. I know peoples. I know ya IP address. I got ya narrowed down to Antarctica about 80 square miles due East from that polar ice cap that looks like a dime baggy.

I'm standing right next to you.

Corleone: For now. You be lying next time, and I wont even dump ya corpse for tha fishes.

Judge: Do you just threaten your lawyers life in my courtroom, Mr. Corleone?

Corleone: I know people..
That's alls im sayin. Just listen when I say I mean business and respect me and stay quiet. I ain't no joke.

I said take the stand by the way... I didnt call you a Stan.

Corleone: Oh shit sorry fam. I cant believe I got sucked into that. I'm amazed. Let's just get some votes goin. Wheres the jury?

Judge: I dont think a jury would help you, Mr. Corleone.

Corleone: Why?

Judge: Cuz you whack as fuck and lost to Sharp.

Corleone: Yo I OWN Sharp.

Judge: You wasted your best Sharp punchlines in Open Mic... twice. Baliff Bayou, please remove this wannabe from my courtroom.

Baliff Bayou: With pleasure... He about to GET... THESE... HANDS.

Corleone: Yo come near me with those mitts I will fucking shank you.

Baliff Bayou: Yooooo... I dont want that smoke. We cool?

Your honor! We just received some evidence in the form of a text conversation between my client and Sharp. In it, Sharp admits defeat in the battle!

Judge: This is... convenient, counselor. But you may proceed on the basis of pure fucking curiosity. Where did you come upon this new evidence?

We received it from a source.

Judge: Which source?

Lars.

Judge: Is this source reliable?

Oh yeah. Straight as an arrow. Never tries to make shit up to get a DQ win out of desperation.

Judge: What?

We call sraL to the stand!

Judge: I thought you said his name was Lars?

It's complicated. Diablo... please step up.

Judge: Diablo? What... the ... fuck.

Prosecution: I object to this in every possible way...

Da Brayn Lord: I hate my life.

Barcotic: I'll fucking fillet you, you red headed fat fuck, I'll use a hook and toss you in a chorus pond. But that doesn't correspond..

Da Brayn Lord: Anyone have a gun I can use to put me out of my misery?

Universe: Ay if Barc can flip cunt-agin' from contagion I can damn well use Viking-dens...

*Gunshot*

I think some dude just shot himself.

Corleone: That was me. I put that hit out. I got dem shooters everywhere.

Everyone: SHUT THE FUCK UP!

Universe you're killing my vibe personally but I'll wait to see if I'm alone but disc might not be your place

Haha I'll stop. This was fun though.