Solemn Sun
 

I am the embodiment of Christ; I conqueror the following of light
Solemnly I cry; for the Doctrine of the light
Martyr of the light; constantly with light
Prophet of the light; conquering the light
I watering the blight; for the solace of my shrine
For the following of light; is the doctrine of my light
I am a gifted seer; swifting fears
For I won't stop breathing with the holy ghost; till' the wind is clear
I am a star; brighter than the sun of centurion
For I am the water; that shines bright on the solemn shimmered sun
You can dream without seeing reality
I am the whispering holy ghost; feeding a fallacy
I am the sun in the night; whispering a funnel of light
For I am a serpent; that is devouring a dragon of plight
I am the early morning sun; shinning sincere
And I will always be the God; always revered

This was not good. And I wanted to like it. It was not good in structure or in some of your word choice. I think it is also unintentionally blasphemous. Or you could be an alias trying to make a mockery of my style?

lmao pretty sure this is just that Rap-Royalty guy

he tends to be on his religious shit from time to time

this one isn’t him at his best

too many rhymes ending in the same word, repeated

obv meant to be all poetic sounding but just comes off a little hackneyed and maybe lazy

word choice isn’t interesting enough to keep the readers interests either and it’s convuluted with poor structure and line breaks that ruin the rhythmic flow

not the worst thing I’ve ever read but just tryna be real

he’s better than this piece makes him out to be

it reads like a keystyle

Yo @Dragon write a verse about me pls

You can not be a god ***
White man is devil....nigga is god.


Good verse

This verse sucks. Light.