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-   -   Her Story (http://netcees.org/showthread.php?t=122375)

MadVerbs 12-31-2015 02:54 PM

Her Story
 
Ah penny in tha cracks of an old alley road
she stood unknown, unhomed n around she roamed.
Through tha frown, she's bold
as each thought collects.
Tha nights are cold n all she's got is debts
can fight or fold, both stop tha mess.
W no sight on goals, she knows she's walkin dead.
Could go find her own but knows she's lost respect
her mind's untold, what defines her soul's locked till death.
Her pop's had left, her mom is addicted to highs
lil brother has grown to b convicted of crimes.
Older brother has homes n sister had died
took ah piece of her w her, now she's missin her vibes.
Wishes she'd listen in time, look pass fixes to find
there's more to life than sniffin ah dime w no mission in line.
(To Be Continued)

Quarter O 12-31-2015 03:28 PM

I like the story so far... Vivid images.. Sum real life shit.. The multis seem a tad forced tho.. I can tell u were struggling to come up with lines.. Or that's how I perceive... Good so far tho.

MadVerbs 01-02-2016 06:41 PM

Thanks for tha feedback.


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