sports betting
 

why did i enter this WORLD

the comedian luis j gomez is fighting another comedian tomorrow at some insane event ellismania tomorrow. well they had a promotion going where you get a big bonus to sign up so i figured id sign up and bet on him

turns out there was a 50 dollar limit though

so i had a bunch of extra money in there, and decided i'd just do some straight bets on preseason games lmao. oh the giants are underdogs? fuck the jets. they're both trash. put money on the giants

now im sitting here watching a preseason game enjoying it far too much.

this is gonna be bad

This is how all middle age white men from the Midwest with porn and miller lite addictions meet their sad demise

Godspeed james

Pre season is such a joke... save it uh oh

no doubt, but that is what is fun about it

i don't have a ton of money on anything, just 50 on the fight tomorrow, 50 on the ravens tomorrow (@dolphins) and 20 on this giants/jets game now

also its all bonus money. i deposited 100 dollars cash, and got a 120 dollar bonus. so i'm playing with bonus money and saving cash for the ravens regular season pretty much, and other locks that have decent lines

but word in order for the bonus money to become real cash, you have to wager a certain amount of money. i got a 10x rollover

so basically since i deposited 100, got 120 bonus, they times that by 10, which is 2200. so i have to wager 2200 for my bonus money to become regular cash

but bonus money bets count. so i'll be 120 towards that win or lose without touching my real money after this weekend

with any luck i think if i win all 3 i'll have like 490ish to bet again, still not touching my actual money i deposited, to put in again, etc.

I've been drinking but this makes complete sense to me

my friend actually used to make decent money betting on e-sports as they're calling it now since its so poorly regulated

may be something here

godspeed

Lol sharp is drunk.

not just yet

shame I dont have admin powers anymore

when I would drink enough I used to do the stupid ban game shit

You are drunk god damnit
@Diode let this man ban people at will.

One more drink and I'll band whoever I please

Wow uh really likes to talk...

MAN

i was going to take my giants winnings and bet the bears, since they were the biggest underdog of the slate of games today as far as the moneyline goes

but it put it in the ravens instead. bears are up 24-10 at the half. fuuuuuuuu

ravens better pull out this game that means nothing against miami lol. i don't mind betting the ravens cuz their depth is stupid, espescially defensively, and RG3 closing out games against 4th stringers in the hopes of securing a roster spot is promising

WINNING ALL MY BETS ISN'T HELPING MY BUDDING ADDICTION

I won 500 on a soccer accumulator today.

It seems like a lot but considering how much money I have lost over the years...I'm getting a little bit of my money back.

nice. i had to google that im such a noob, i'm guessing its like a parlay? like you win more money but you have to bet more games and be right with every single one?

i don't got the balls yet.

i ended up throwing my real 100 in on the ravens before the game. so i got 261 on this game, i think they were favorites though so i only win like 200 while risking the 261.

but in 2 days i've basically turned 100 into a little over 500 assuming this retard wins his fight tonight

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0IPkDtb73nQ

but i've only got 50 on that so either way i've got at least 400 something

IM HOOKED

Basically yeah, I follow 3 Divisions of English football, so my bets are usually well informed....but I do not usually win like I just won.

i'm a fucking retard

https://image.ibb.co/jSxPoU/retard.jpg

LETS GOOOO. LMAO

im still pretending/deluding myself into thinking its only 100. since the majority is bonus money that doesn't get unlocked until i put 2200 in wagers up. but word if the bungles win this meaningless game this afternoon im sitting pretty

there is just nothing to bet on at the moment and i'm trying to bet until i lose all this money or unlock the bonus money and just cash out

edit - not sure why its resized? probably a forum thing. but word if you click it you'll see i got 572.52 on the bengals with the chance to win 1173.67

I stopped betting as much as I used to but I did quite a bit on NCAAF and UFC. I did a lot of parlay bets for college football. I put a new down payment on my SUV with winnings I got from Prop bets during the superbowl between Pats and Seahawks.

nice

i don't know though MAN, parlays and prop bets lol. i guess betting preseason in general is the same idea though as far as risk is concerned since its just nonsense. but i would be pissed if i bet a parlay and 1 out of the 5 games fucks it all up.

but i know nothing

somehow the bengals are annihilating the bills, which i thought was possible obviously since i bet them

but this is destroying my mind

if the winnings clear prior to the cowboys cardinals i might just throw it all away on the cowboys to rid my mind of this tomfoolery

but with my luck the cowboys would win and perpetuate this cycle of torture where i win every bet i place expecting to lose, until i make a huge one expecting to win and lose it all

its honestly reminding me of fanduel/draftkings

where i played it stupid safe in beginner "50/50"s

i turned 20 bucks into like 800 before losing. i thought i was untouchable because i only had to be better than 50 percent of entrants. i thought i found a glitch in the betting system and would become a professional DFS player lmao. visions of retirement and just playing it safe to a fortune

now i'm getting those visions again

i don't know why i do this to myself.

Quit now

You've done well

Put it towards a new VR sex doll bong or whatever you spend your money on these days