10,000 P.C.E.
There’s a ghost in the machine
It dwells inside the box There’s “coding” on the screen Of sigils and spells A Ouija board of keys Opens portals into Hell Uploading entities Think of H.P. with a Dell Or Apple tempting Eve “Please, take another byte” Hissed a serpent named Steve Who slithered through the leaf(s) Of fiber optic trees Corrupting ancient data Deleting it with ease Like “Generation Isis” Computerized Eden Generates a virus (The “Genesis disease”) Encrypted in the scripture Encoded in a dream The secret algorithm The Oracle perceived |
Dude, this was a fucking sick read. The metaphors and similies is unique and interesting, clever way of putting technology in perspective. This was definitely dope.
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Thanks bro. I appreciate that.
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Raw as fuck...I've read this 12 times.
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i liked this brother
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sucked thx
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Glad everyone like it. Thanks for reading.
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This was nice. Bb is a troll. 10000 post computer era?
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o haha
no bb rlly thanked it sucke thx? no troll. really fucka suck thx. thx |
Oh I get it it's puns about computers.
Deep. |
Like when GZA did "Labels", released in 1995 (24 years ago), but with computers. Or when the 7th Grade teacher asks you to do alliteration. But, like, in a B+ term paper form. I dig it.
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Fire my G. Foh shiggidy
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All I do is write nonsensical non-rhyming paragraphs about vaguely remembered vaginas and Nicorette every 12 months when I'm drunk in the Open Mic Cypher then I delete them the next morning. This, is art. All of the lines are well measured, and pretty close to the same length in terms of Netcees message boards typeface. And there are double entendres. And its kind of like, computers vs. not-computers, in comparison WITHIN the double entendres. A serpent like Steve, is my favorite pun because it's just a descriptive bullshit line barely hanging onto the creative idea of the piece. And adding the (S) to leaf was a masterstroke. Instead of just saying leaf, which still rhymes (it's a more nuanced rhyme, I.M.O.) you let the reader know you know how plurality works (with a wink because its leaves but you know that haha!) but also let the reader know how the reader should read, which is necessary because you are smarter than the reader.
Let's break down a line "The Oracle perceived" The oracle is, like, a seer or something and was, like, revered, and what have you, during the old times. Oracle is also a computer company. Dope. |
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Thanks for the read/feed ppl. Much appreciated. |
Fire. Nice Read
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Enjoyed the read. Like everyone else pointed out, the metaphors you kept up and stayed within your scheme, very nice and hard to do. Creative, each line had a purpose
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part II
…processing |
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