all rise
 

the king is back... holla

giraffes fapping.

Rhinocerous jacking it

Female hyenas scissoring

Rhinoceros ass to mouth

starfish amputee friction.

coyotes busting nuts on ocelot whiskers

Dolphin cunnilingus

Hi.

Edit: don't understand the animals references, explain plz

caged snail's ooze slurping.

Meerkats teabaggin prairie dogs

Walri tusking Elephant ears

Lobsters having one night stands and giving each other crabs

Periwinkles penetrating pig fleas

mountain lions snowballin monitor lizard jizz

battle me u bitch

SRI LANKAN FORREST YAKS SODOMOZING PLATYPI

Judge Judy sucking Pat Sajak's wang while Bobby the brain Heenan stands behind her and vomits onto her head.

literally lold. My retort sir:


The big show eating Mae West's cunt fungus hungrily, as she lights daniel Bryans beard on fire while giving him a salty sockdog.

RIP Mae Young


A shark jacking off a dolphin as the dolphin skeets onto a sea otter's mustache

a polar bear being cuckolded by 3 white wolves to his polar bear wife as a coyote bangs one of the wolves with a strap on and the polar being is cuffed to a chair and you skip to 6:39 and the polar bear is eating the cum of the 3 white wolves and then gets banged by the coyote with the strap on and why are you still watching

Ok, fair enough. How about a time machine that lets you go back to the early 90's so you can fuck Hilary Banks from Fresh Prince but the stipulation is that you have to take the time machine back to 2014 and watch Michael J Fox and Muhammed Ali jack each other off.

Also it is revealed to you that the past can not be altered, therefore you didn't actually bang Hilary Banks.

That puts me into another time machine conundrum: what if you were offered the chance to go back in time and have your way with Lindsey Lohan during her mean girl and herbie hancock phase, but the catch is that you would have to travel into the future and sip the vile nectar of her crusty meth snatch afterwards? worth it?

I'd sign up for that right now, no trollmo

What if you could motorboat Kate Upton's tits for 30 minutes if you agreed to sit naked and watch a gay porn of Trace Adkins and Tony Stewart have sex in the back of a Ford F150 in a TGIFriday's parking lot in St. Paul Minnesota.

Before you answer, the money shot is of Tony Stewart shaving off Trace Adkins mustache using skeet as shaving cream.

fe, I would too playa.

as for your scenario, hells yeah. Kate Upton got da bomb rack. I would make her touch my thang too and slide it in between em. I would simply imagine that tony stewart was Anthony Colavito and then it wouldn't be weird at all, it would be normal...no homo.

who would you rather get with, on your nation now keep it 100, He man or Lion-o?

Imma say Lion-O. I'd rather not elab on it tho.

What if you could watch your grandma scissor with Brooke Shields but they'd wipe it afterwards with one of them Men In Black flashers. Would you still try to finish first?

I don't have a Grandma......

I know, homey... That's why I started it with "what if you could".

You ever think about time traveling back to the moment you were conceived and having a 3 way with your mom and dad?

That's a movie right there.

Get out of my head Charles!

your Telepathy is on point right now my old friend. Keeping it on everything you love, you ever touch your boyhood dog's weiner?

edit: upon considering that I did not answer your question of what if, I say that I would rather not play the what if game....like what if I was born with two dicks? would I get one chubster and poke my butt while whirly-birding the other one in my hand until I "sprinkler system-ed" all over my Aunt Gertrude's kitchen? ICCI homey...ICCI.

You are matrixboarding right now. My mind just got blown like income tax Christmas .

edit: everything I just said. trust me.

Imagine Wilfred Brimley giving Kathy Bates the Arabian Goggles on a Slip N' Slide coated in sausage gravy.

This thread isn't great but it's still way better than when it first started out.

That chubbed me.

Imagine ernest borgnine post-airwolf pumping away furiously in between whoopi goldbergs cooch meat

Imagine Delta Burke shitting directly onto Tom Selleck's chest hairs while the dude who did Venkman's voice on the Ghostbusters cartoon gives play by play.

Damn cuz....

Thats like trying to imagine Ron perlman sodomizing your peehole with that red plastic cheese spreader from the old school handi snacks whilw being forced to chug bea arthurs colostomy bag at gunpoint by the muslim brotherhood my dude.

Daaaaaaaaaaaaaaamn.

That's like dumping Droz from the WWE out of his wheelchair and beating his legs with a diaperbag full of baby raccoons.

Khloe and Lamar scent on 50% off due to ruptured nuptials, I'm copping and spraying.

Hardass Niggaz making a comeback run, somebody page Tonio and Hacksaw Jim Thuggin.

Diaper bag of baby racoons made me consider asking you if you found the kool aid man sexually attractive.....funny how the mind works.

I never really made that connection with the Kool Aid man. Now that I think about it tho, I could see me fucking the Sugar Smacks frog and the Kool Aid man busting through the wall to quench my thirst from sexual dehydration. Like some type of cherry bukkake or something.

I like really want to fuck Velma from the live action Scoobie Doo tho. I'd fuck all the female Avatars too.

Velma has always been sexy. I love smart chicks. I want to smokey the bear a librarian. You know, when you smashing them from the back doggy style, and then wait for them to start cumming, then light their hair on fire?

Smokey is about prevention, where I'm from we call that The Ghostrider.

You ever give a chick the Cold Lunch? That's where she is giving you head and you vomit onto the top of her head right before you nut. They always freeze in shock and lift their arms up, then splatow! With the baby batter. Flawless if timing is on point.

I also like the Christopher Reeve. That's where the whole night she feels like she's flying but the next day she can't walk. If she can walk, then it is downgraded to The Dean Cain.