His pockets are full of graham crackers and he sells knockoff Armani kufis out of a stationwagon

I drive a Hummer, this nigga drives a hummus

got convicted in Saudi Arabia for statutory rage

his bedsheets are covered in red peppers & tahini

Nigga thought red bottoms meant walking on coals

his goal in life is to make Cocoa Krispies rain from the skies of Machu Piccu

Nigga has a golden amulet that makes tiger faces form out of sand lol

This nigga named his terrier Sir Francis Turkey Bacon

Nigga got an Etch-A-Sketch of the Twin Towers hanging on his wall

"I am Gazeem!"

lol

Nigga's favorite number is jihad

he lost a bar fight to Lars 37 times

The Iranian police force knows him distinctly as "The Mayonnaise Assassin"

Looking like he sleeps on car batteries & uses a tank door for a sheet

I asked him if his chick pees on him & he said he left them in his fridge

Each time he flies with Qatari Airlines they prepare a sponge cake for him

No, putting Jasmine in an hourglass will NOT make you a real sultan.

Glasses have filed 57 restraining orders on his nose

lookin like he uses Nickelodeon slime as shaving cream

he dismantles Roflcopters for a living in North Algeria

Every time he hears RiFF RaFF, he says "street rat"

He looks like the Geico lizard entered a VH1 humanization project.

His cave has a sliding glass door that opens to another cave

Coined the phrase "fly 'til I die"

Whenever he goes to Kinkos he says 'Genie, I wish for you to make me a prints.'

Megalodon sightings were mistaken as this nigga doing the back stroke in the Indian Ocean

he looted Saddam's palace with a pacemaker and a pair of tweezers

He started a new form of Krav Maga called Balaclava

lmao

These Are the Faces of Genital Warts in 2013 America.

I bet you couldn't walk a mile in his sandals

I don't remember Rors***h being vaguely hispanic

that faggot w/ the beanie looks like a metrosexual Manu Ginobili on crack

and the other faggot that needs a haircut looks like he did his best to look like Velma from Scooby Doo

He's the poster boy for Afghani Pepsi

Was tazed & jailed for saying "boom goes the dynamite"

As gracious as he may be with the pen, he isn't so kind with cylindrical explosive devices

he wears roasted lamb scented cologne

Hi-fives a poster of Tom Cruise every morning on his way to work in the sewers

this would've been the Jackson 5 if they were white hippies

his DNA code reads 'BOOMAYEH ALI'

This is getting ridiculous lol