my earliest memory was when i was thrown off the football team after the last game in 7th grade. i did 3 seasons of midget football. 4th, 5th, and 6th. i was a white ray lewis mixed with a black mike alstott. i played midget for canton south which was a well funded league with rich white kids and recruited black kids. even in the earliest stages this is the heartland canton ohio where football is life. but anyways i was always one of the best kids on the team. then in middle school i went to souers which was hood as it gets. no funding. terrible team with kids who never played. i was the only good player. started for the 8th grade team at FB and LB as well as 7th obviously, i just hated playing there. no one cared. we'd get blown out. after the last game where massillon blew us out like 63-0 i decided to punch a team mate in the face on the way to the bus. i was thrown off the team. we then moved to massillon and i participated in the summer training/conditioning, coaches loved me. i was gonna be an animal. i decided weed alcohol and bitches were more important and quit. i let myself down that day. i just didnt know it. i failed every single class in 8th grade because i was getting handjobs under the desks and was too busy clowning to care about doing work. they passed me through anyways because i could do the work i just didnt. and or they just didnt give a shit. i let down ms. griggs because she wrote in my year book that she looked forward to watching me on madtv. its coming back now too so the letdown is fresh again.

so then i went to high school and continued my buffoonery. i failed 9th grade the first time and felt like a loser since it was the legit first time i was held back. so my second time in 9th grade i actually did enough work for passing grades. the problem was i skipped like 43 days. so even though i had passing grades, i was failed on attendance so i dropped out instead of going back to 9th for the 3rd time.

that was probably my first let down to others. at least others that mattered. my parents.

since then i've done nothing but let everyone down.

Very good. Elab on your parents.

Thus are the tales of Joe Dirt

Really not prepared for feels rollercoaster of a uh-oh autobiography with punch-ins by Veritas.

Daniel...how have you been? It has been a while since we have taken the time to sort things out, yes?

We've never sorted things out, James. I reject your authority on such matters, out of hand. I did just feed your most recent Open Mic, thought it was an improvement.

and do you base your rejections on anything substantial? Or just personal hatred towards beings exponentially superior to yourself in all realms of categorization based upon your own known failings in said areas which hide behind the ironic blahzayness you front on about continually?

My rejection is based on the use of the word 'being' in the second sentence of that post.

and do you base your rejections on anything substantial? Or just personal hatred towards "people" exponentially superior to yourself in all realms of categorization based upon your own known failings in said areas which hide behind the ironic blahzayness you front on about continually?

please see my question to you in my open mic, and thank you.

I saw your post. I even started an in-depth feed, with a plan to break down sections of multiple OM's you've written. The start was about the infinite possibilities of wording and audacity to correct when there's no correct to correct to. All that. But that seems like some sort of work at the moment. I'll eventually do it, though.

This post motivated me to be didactic tbh.

lol

your hipster response inspired me dan, check the open mic. Thanks bruv

I read it. Objectively not good.

It was a love letter to your foolishness.

A poorly written one with no discernable talent and less wit. I'm just trying to help you be less shit and this is how you repay me. For shame.

I think the highest I've made in a complete year is around 28k. That was at age 21. I'm 30 now. I did have a position earlier this year for 18 an hour and that would have been about 37 but lost the job after 2 months for a reason unbeknownst to me. Missouri is an at will state, but I was also in my first 90 days still so they could let me go without even telling me why. So they didn't.

I went back washing dishes for 8.65 for 3 months and got arrested while delivering pizzas because I had warrants for bad tags, even tho I had clean tags and insurance at the time. After getting arrested again I decided that I needed to get back to my kid so I moved back in with my girlfriend of 6 years. Not a complete 6 years because I was living in utah at the time and was not with her. So proceed to go ahead and clown me for that also. I don't even give a shit anymore man. I'm about to start this job that's at least decent, vs being in a shit storm of a situation drowning in both emotion and debt. I get to spend time with my kid. She's a crazy crazy crazy woman and I love her to death even with all the shit we been through. I'm no better anyways, so fuck it. LOVE IS REAL SON. I just know I'd rather be a decent citizen paying taxes with my kid than being a slouch playing video games all day working minimum wage and stacking debt.

lol @ fins son calls him fin

That would be cool, but I like Dad way better.

No.

I sincerely asked you to elaborate upon how I could improve and was sincere and humbled. You in turn acted like it was too much work in your typical hipster fashion .

So....

Fair?