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-   -   MMA fighter vs. A chimpanzee , who would win (http://netcees.org/showthread.php?t=84323)

uh-oh 07-21-2014 09:57 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Diode (Post 367196)
Wolves do not like to engage alone tho.

There will almost always be 6 other ones waiting to finish you while you're distracted.

well yea duh

but so will chimps

they hunt like wolves but they can also take to the trees

this is a gladiator forced fight fake scenario obv

how big is a wolves throat tho?

you could probably force your arm completely into the wolves throat trying to go in to the shoulder and kill it.

but it could always just back away/off your hand and eat your head too i guess

big baby 07-21-2014 10:03 PM

mad dogs bigger/stronger than wolves, wolves just have a slightly different mentality.

like a dog would apologize after fucking your girlfriend

a wolf would apologize to you before he fucks your girlfriend

1 on 1 i think tons of people like nik-a and them would get alpha maled by a wolf, but alphas like me and big sexy strong diode and pancake would bodybag a wolf tbh. if you trying to fuck with those russian prison dogs then idk if that throat shoving shit gonna work cause hes gonna be liek this idiot IM GONNA EAT HIM soon your gonna be inside this nigga belly just being digested and shit like nah not gonna work. a chimp aint shit, like real talk, if some nigga that was 5 foot tall but benched 500 lbs wanted to fight you would yo ube scared or nah? like a legit human, thats 5 ft, and weighs less than you but can bench 500 , and squat like 700, would you LEGIT be scared of him, in a legit fight? i mean hes strong but hes fucking tiny, all you have to do is fucking swing this nigga around, hes not even fucking heavier than you wtf? physics has to givein somewhere

Mike Wrecka 07-21-2014 10:17 PM

you guys are acting like chimps are the super sentinels of the wild

they are scared shitless of anything their size or bigger. they go run up a tree


a leopard sees one alone, he attacks it and kills it instantly. the chimp doesn't put up a fight at all, its just instant death. same as it would do to a human.


chimps cant survive without trees to run up and hide. they cant survive on the plains of Africa, people with sharpened sticks survive there though




the reason I said MMA fighter is because chimps ground and pound. an MMA fighter could possibly have the experience to get out of that situation

Certain 07-21-2014 10:18 PM

The only dogs bigger than a full-sized gray wolf are genetic freaks and rarities like cane corsos and bullmastiffs.

PancakeBrah 07-21-2014 10:19 PM

Human=/=Leopard

The chimp has the flight option in the wild. He knows it's better to escape a tangle with a dangerous animal.

If we throw one in a cage with another human, fight is the only option.

That's when the testicular maiming comes into play.

TYSON 07-21-2014 10:41 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Diode (Post 367194)
No because we all just know @TYSON will ignore me and go back to snapchatting 8 year olds :(

Real funny

TYSON 07-21-2014 10:43 PM

http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2013/...27_634x404.jpg
None of y'all fucking with this dog....the last was fake lol

jilti 07-21-2014 11:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Diode (Post 367184)
I will not let this go unnoticed.

Haven't had a new dirt person in a long while.


Lol i train at So Cal Fight Factory

maths debate 07-22-2014 05:50 AM

lmao @ humans being domesticated animals

el pancake the poster child for suburban white ppl

maths debate 07-22-2014 05:54 AM

but word chimps are vicious little shits

i saw this baboon documentary on nat geo cot damn those dirty fucks are some nasty creatures

throwing feces and shit

dont fight the chimp, be the chimp

Half Wit It 07-22-2014 06:14 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by namix (Post 367153)
MMA fighter, because humans ought to be smart 'nuf to bring a gun to a chimp fight.

This.

But really, if I'm cornered by any vicious wild animal I'm going for the eye gouge
Blind the beast and MAYBE you escape with a few bites and gashes.

I wonder what a Bruce Lee side kick to the abdomen would do to a chimp tho..

Diode 07-22-2014 10:20 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jilti (Post 367254)
Lol i train at So Cal Fight Factory

there's a difference between training and fighting.

just because i train 4 days a week doesn't mean metamoris is calling me up to fill in next week.

fightpage link, pls.

Batty 07-22-2014 01:49 PM

Anything delicate on your body is getting straight ripped the fuck off by a pissed off chimp, trust.

There's niggas missing their eyes, nose, mouth, dick and nuts ALL TOGETHER cause a chimp flipped on them.

MMA fighters train to fight other MMA fighters, Chimps go into Hulk Smash rage mode and beat shit into pulps.

You better be way strapped if one runs up on you or you are fucked.

StarFaggot 07-22-2014 02:00 PM

A chimp with gloves, a cup, a face guard and shoes loses to me if I had on the same gear.

A bare chimp would still lose to me with my bare knuckles bc I can go crazy too. Idc about their strength it don't matter when the force of a punch renders them unconscious. It's about the hand speed & coordination.

Y'all losing the fight before it begins bc ur mental isn't right.

Split 07-22-2014 02:01 PM

Is the phrase "go apeshit" or "go MMAshit"? I can't seem to recall

Even if you snuck up on a chimp and put it in an armbar, it has 3 other arms and a human brain that collapses to a minuscule Masaiiize when it gets cornered

dead man 07-22-2014 02:09 PM

http://cdn.inquisitr.com/wp-content/...fore-after.jpg

StarFaggot 07-22-2014 02:11 PM

If you aren't willing to maim a chimp you should be nowhere near them.

Split 07-22-2014 02:14 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by dead man (Post 367474)


http://www.vizzed.com/vizzedboard/re...2013_56_57.jpg

Certain 07-22-2014 02:26 PM

I laughed.

Mike Wrecka 07-22-2014 03:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by dead man (Post 367474)

ya that is sad.


but



she is alive. if a trained fighter attacked her with all they had she would be dead


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