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-   -   THE ROAST OF SLOWHANDS (http://netcees.org/showthread.php?t=8188)

Greed 06-27-2013 06:41 PM

Will be starring as doug funny in the live action movie adaptation of the original series

Is slow with them hands

Spends his money on prostitutes. Shops at goodwill.

Relationship status on facebook - 'irrelevant'

Googled his gov't name - 1 billion results

Flow 06-27-2013 06:53 PM

@Pryde your roasting the bloke who gave a vote your way... That made
No sense whatsoever

Slowhands 06-27-2013 07:57 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Flo Real (Post 85736)
@Pryde your roasting the bloke who gave a vote your way... That made
No sense whatsoever

it's all in good fun man, plus you barely managed to rhyme a word. much less throw a punch.

Vulgar 06-27-2013 08:14 PM

Monte Crython

FGR 06-27-2013 08:41 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by J. Metts (Post 85672)
Looking like he blogs about how i met your mother.

this had me rollin

Slowhands 06-27-2013 08:57 PM

^ yea it was ..uh ..good

Objective 06-27-2013 10:07 PM

lmfao @ the faggot trying to show off with a picture of his car with cleansed condoms instead of dice in the mirror and the car being a Harley Davidson to try to impress MC's on the net at the same time. A picture says more than thousand insults and it's remarkable that a picture without you in it could do this much damage. Even the dog wants you to kill yourself.

http://i.imgur.com/1lnhJPR.jpg

Slowhands 06-27-2013 11:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Objective (Post 85887)
lmfao @ the faggot trying to show off with a picture of his car with cleansed condoms instead of dice in the mirror and the car being a Harley Davidson to try to impress MC's on the net at the same time. A picture says more than thousand insults and it's remarkable that a picture without you in it could do this much damage. Even the dog wants you to kill yourself.

http://i.imgur.com/1lnhJPR.jpg

you sound either offended or envious, seriously, shit is like pyscology 101 college shit. you ever been to college? people attack what they are threatened by. you can call it what you want to save face, but fact is, i posted a pic, and i'm not fazed by this wak ass comedy club.

but if you want, you can save more face with a pic battle. that goes for any of you. should be an easy win since i'm a wak white boy

Rawn M.D. 06-27-2013 11:14 PM

I think what objective was saying when a Roast goes down the person being roasted is supposed to remain silent and just take it.. Not participate or reply. That's just the normal etiquette for these occasions. N tbh they ain't even go in on u like normal... Prob due to the increase of roasts as of late hence figurative no roasts for a week thread.

Slowhands 06-27-2013 11:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rawn MacDon (Post 85930)
I think what objective was saying when a Roast goes down the person being roasted is supposed to remain silent and just take it.. Not participate or reply. That's just the normal etiquette for these occasions. N tbh they ain't even go in on u like normal... Prob due to the increase of roasts as of late hence figurative no roasts for a week thread.

either way, nobody still wont accept a pic battle and i havn't battled in years

Rawn M.D. 06-27-2013 11:27 PM

Relax ur time will come

u haven't even been properly welcomed yet

Slowhands 06-27-2013 11:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rawn MacDon (Post 85944)
Relax ur time will come

u haven't even been properly welcomed yet

lol if you didn't know i'm good at showing up for a day, week, month and then gone for a year.

Rawn M.D. 06-27-2013 11:33 PM

Lol Idk n idc tbh

but u do look like u got ur head stuck in a vice as a child and ur parents attempted to pull u out

Slowhands 06-27-2013 11:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rawn MacDon (Post 85956)
Lol Idk n idc tbh

but u do look like u got ur head stuck in a vice as a child and ur parents attempted to pull u out

meh ok attempt

Rawn M.D. 06-27-2013 11:38 PM

Lol disregard what I tried to kick to u.. N it was statementish bc it was a statement wasn't rally aiming for loss.. Keep replying tho its a good look.

Slowhands 06-27-2013 11:46 PM

cool story, needs more dragons

Split 06-28-2013 12:17 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Figurative (Post 85665)
SORRY BUD, SITE RULES IS RULES

http://i.imgur.com/mhrUr0g.jpg?1

LOL

has that "I just plugged a jar of peanut butter full of dick" face on

actually goes cuckoo for coco puffs

this nigga wears earplugs to the movies to prevent hearing loss

LOL color matches his furniture to his dog.

matches perfectly his expression to his dog as well. considers it his second favorite superpower next to his innate sense of when his farts are gonna be wet

treats the McDonald charity bucket like his tip jar

lookin like he's 28 and still shops at Old Navy. constantly tries to find the stores n summer camps his shirts are referencing, often makes up stories when people ask so he doesn't feel awkward

this nigga strongly identifies with solar flares

got a purple heart in his valiant and noble efforts to burn those shorts. the memory haunts him to this day

lookin like his preferrred form of money transfer is eskimo kisses

thought racketeering charges were a tax on tennis strings

this dudes hobby is cross referencing child pornography to the cast of Animorphs

whenever he types a smiley, he mimics that face. every. single time.

lookin like his astrological sign is the homing pigeon and he was born in the year of the fig newton

this dude tried to get into sidewalk chalk and got told he didnt have the sense of perspective

lookin like he did every research paper on Oedipus Rex 8 years running, regardless of the assignment

his greatest dream is to knock off the computer in Windows Pinball

for perpetual loner Slowhands, every single knock knock joke ends in tears

i fucking guarantee this photo was taken by himself with a shot timer

lookin like he plays with a 36 handicap in Mini Putt

this niggas got prescription beer goggles

this dude got a fantasy gym class team for the elementary school exactly 1,000 yds away. currently 7th in division

if you multiply any fake phone number by zero you get this niggas SSN

lookin like his dream job is substitute chorus teacher

that grin haunts the memo pad of every sketch artist on the west coast

this faggot applies gold bond with an RC cropduster

this dude still thinks the pitchers mound is a base

was Sergeant at Arms of every non-contact extracurricular at his naval military school

drives a wheelbarrow with a pizza box topsail. most successful pickup line: "chips ahoy, mate-me!"

this dude is the sum of 15 years of awkward prom dates

this dude is allergic to bra straps

his ring-tone is a dog whistle, owns sixteen CDs of authentic Alltel ringback tones he uses to pregame for speed dating

recently checked into rehab for awkward couch posture rehab. was clean for seventeen minutes before he put a pillow on his lap and crossed his elbows

this nigga is the human reincarnation of Prohibition

once reported his father to the hallway patrol for leaving the ceiling fan on in the loft overnight

lookin like he ships himself to PO boxes around the country to save on vacation costs

wrote Aero's book on penny stock investing

lookin like he text battles

Split 06-28-2013 12:18 AM

LOOKIN LIKE THAT NIGGERFAGGOT THAT REPLIES TO EVEYR ROAS.AT REPLY WITH HIS PERSONAL OPINION ON THE ATTACK ON HIS LACKING MORAL CHARACTER AND LAUGHABLE POSTURE

Fig 06-28-2013 12:23 AM

Split just won life

Slowhands 06-28-2013 12:24 AM

way too much to read, stopped at beer goggles

Slowhands 06-28-2013 12:24 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Split Eight (Post 86055)
LOOKIN LIKE THAT NIGGERFAGGOT THAT REPLIES TO EVEYR ROAS.AT REPLY WITH HIS PERSONAL OPINION ON THE ATTACK ON HIS LACKING MORAL CHARACTER AND LAUGHABLE POSTURE

lol

Slowhands 06-28-2013 12:31 AM

http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/pict...&pictureid=898

here is another of me, hope it spawns creativity at least

Geno 06-28-2013 12:33 AM

looking like the old navy dropped an anchor on his collar

Split 06-28-2013 12:37 AM

lookin like everytime he uses a coinstar machine he yells "make it rain". lookin like his dad is an unknown waterbed repair man. dude always talks about 'the struggle' but his referring to his subzero bone density. this dude owns goretex crotchless overalls. watches the same six Wheel of Fortune episodes to improve his memory. this dude's got a White Knight utility belt with a tampon harpoon, liquid kleenex and emergency TMJ pamphlets. this dudes such a pervo faggot he got he REM cycle license revoked. was a mallcop for a week, got his pink slip for arresting a toddler for 'purposefully stepping on cracks', later summarized as 'gross misconduct'. this dude asks his girls opinions on petnames on they first date. if pathetic was a spanish verb this dude could conjugate it perfectly despite his extreme lisp. stalked Michael J Fox for six years because he misunderstood the figurative phrase "knock you back into tomorrow". was a fulltime magician at family birthday parties, his opening line was "And for my next act, I'll make your disappointment disappear". he didnt know any card tricks. this dudes credit rating is higher than Vulgars SAT score. someone edited in about Slowhands "Randolf McPulfrey is partially responsible for the holocaust" and Wikipedia elected to keep it in

SiK 06-28-2013 12:42 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Slowhands (Post 86072)
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/pict...&pictureid=898

here is another of me, hope it spawns creativity at least

ummmm where?

Split 06-28-2013 12:44 AM

http://i1277.photobucket.com/albums/...ps66b010d7.jpg

Slowhands 06-28-2013 12:44 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SiK (Post 86091)
ummmm where?

http://i.imgur.com/Fg9aRP7.jpg

Meth 06-28-2013 12:45 AM

TOO MANY PICTURES OF HIM ON THIS PAGE LOL WTF

Split 06-28-2013 12:45 AM

put in the airborne division ever since the CDC declared Bieber Fever an infectious disease

Slowhands 06-28-2013 12:46 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Meth (Post 86098)
TOO MANY PICTURES OF HIM ON THIS PAGE LOL WTF

i do requests too

Split 06-28-2013 12:46 AM

AA patch speaks for itself

SiK 06-28-2013 12:47 AM

I remember my first 240B

Slowhands 06-28-2013 12:47 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Split Eight (Post 86102)
AA patch speaks for itself

yea you're right

Slowhands 06-28-2013 12:48 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SiK (Post 86103)
I remember my first 240B

cool, didn't know people still played BF3

SiK 06-28-2013 12:49 AM

Actually i wear the same uniform dumbass

Split 06-28-2013 12:50 AM

your comebacks are almost as strong as the sincerely forlorn look permanently affixed to ur mug

Slowhands 06-28-2013 12:52 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SiK (Post 86106)
Actually i wear the same uniform dumbass

82nd? probably not

Slowhands 06-28-2013 12:53 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Split Eight (Post 86107)
your comebacks are almost as strong as the sincerely forlorn look permanently affixed to ur mug

and you're wasting your worthless energy on weak attempts at being relevant to what is going on. just stop, you look desperate and it shows. go back to text crews and fantasy shit man.

SiK 06-28-2013 12:53 AM

Oh cause 82nd is a uniform now?

And no. 2ID, Old Ironsides, and now 101st

Slowhands 06-28-2013 12:56 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SiK (Post 86111)
Oh cause 82nd is a uniform now?

And no. 2ID, Old Ironsides, and now 101st

no but we, in the 82nd, don't associate ourselves with the rest of the Army. The army you know doesn't exist at Ft Bragg, we actually go to war, not fobbit warriors with taclights and acogs on weapons that'll never be fired.


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