Originally Posted by Pharaohs Army (Post 593524)

All good these days.

Welp. I looked.

Quarter O,
although I agree with Big baby that it sucked, perhaps eventually you will go on a multi-year healing journey to merge your split self, learn how to write what you wanna say, creating epic multi-topicals with some of the smartest writers in the world, even if it took some friction along the way.

The people giving you feedback are all overrated, stuck inside an artistic box. Keep doin u man

Originally Posted by UnbornBuddha (Post 593151)

Okay since you asked, I read this and found nothing memorable. There were attempts of cleverness and an attempt of a more feral style, but it came up as uninspired. And your last rhymes were very trite, all -ologies without any manipulation of complex schemes. So the content wasn't enjoyable for me, there's nothing that will make me remember oh this is Quarter O piece. The thing that you have going for more in this piece is the tone, a braggadocio swag, but even this comes off as novice. There also grammatical faults that could be improved upon by co-verbs and simple conjunctive rephrasing. As it stands now, this wasn't anything that is worth keeping. My biggest suggestion is to read some good writings here, and try to find what makes them good. And build on that, create a knowledge basis, this was too simplistic and uninspired.

Originally Posted by Split Eight (Post 593472)

lolyikes

I hope your potential career as a rapper isn't what's keeping you from going full-time at Pizza Hut

cuz I got sum bad newz brah