i'm pooping.

then shower. the writing.

Did you just tell us you shower instead of wiping?

Fosters ,

nope. wiping is assumed. unless you are a foreign, in which case you are probably taking a squirt up your asshole instead.

If @Vividlyvague and @Mr. J no-show here, no one who wrote a verse every week last season will have done so this season.

@dyedinthewool an hour and 40mins left miss, I hope youre not at work :(

@Diode i knew you were alright.

story of my life.

I choose to respect your name change.

I am working, this piece is going to be shy of pure shit. I apologize.

I actually don't think so.

59 minutes.

I am unblinkingly steadfast in this. Do not test.

@dyedinthewool im sure whatever you got is better than my actual piece of shit

i am gambling strong with this one.

At this point, I have no idea who will show of those who haven't yet, other than you.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EB9tqgdCt5I

lol'd for some reason

THE DEADLINE IS IN 15 MINUTES.

Looking like a lot of no-shows. That's rather unfortunate, albeit expected.

@Certain whatever happened to that Cimmerian cat? he was one of my favorites to read pieces by when FS.com was still around

He was here recently. I don't think he's particularly active. @trap would know.

word that's cool atleast. cool to see some of his pieces in the archives, brings me back

You can read a lot of it here:

http://www.urbanprowlers.net/vb/foru...c&daysprune=-1

UrbanProwlers is bordering on dead now, but its archive goes back more than 12 years.

by the skin of my taint.

can you please put the missing s next to " it' " in

"it' useless, though."

it even has the apostrophe!

if not, i understand.

People will figure it out.

This is why posting at the gun is a bad idea.

it's alright. i had been editing the last 10 minutes. just happened to miss two small things from my tinkering. no frank-level failures.

i'm mostly pissed i didn't have time to put in the proper localized accent characters and punctuation everywhere. stupid us keyboard and lack of memorization of ascii character maps in 2014.

why u do dis frank? you are too good for this.

:\

Of course I noticed. I spoke to Frank. He made a minor aesthetic change, adding an italics.

I will let him off the hook one time and also made the "it's" change for you several minutes ago.

This is Week 1, so I'm siding with leniency. This will not happen again.

DO NOT EDIT YOUR VERSES.

i like lenient certain. he is way better than the other guy.

All losses have been added to the records of those who no-showed. You may stay in the league by voting on three battles and posting those links in the dedicated thread.

To those who were no-showed (@Mike Wrecka, @Kyzo, @patrown, @H4ZE, @Vividlyvague, @Cereal_Killa, @Greed, @Adonis, @Geo Oats, @Innovator, @Totoro and @TYSON), be sure to vote on three battles or you, too, will be given a loss. Post links in this dedicated thread, please.

Also, the no-show shine section of the magazine will be extensive.

For what it's worth, I projected 12 no-shows and ended up with 14. That wouldn't be so bad except that only one battle was a double no-show, meaning there only are nine open battles.

Let's give those nine open battles a shitload of votes.

Not bad. @Split Eight is the biggest upset by far.

(Triple-post fatality.)

Last season's Week 1 had 26 competitors, and 17 showed (65.4%). So having 30 of 44 (68.2%) show this time actually is a slight improvement.

I'll def be getting those votes in

How's the weather, @Geo Oats?

Split Eight was obv scared. he will post something about being at a college hockey game after party with wall to wall chicks but in reality he was alone and frightened starting at my screen name having anxiety attacks

Lars vs. dead man will count toward the voting requirement.

ALSO, post your links in the links thread.

@El Pancake, have you listened to the new St. Vincent album?

No I didn't even know one was out. 'Strange Mercy' is a great album. Is the new one kind of the same?

It's more exploratative, for better and worse. But it's very, very good.

It's self-titled.